


building me up (but buttercup, you lied)

by outropeace



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Actor Harry Styles, Actor Louis Tomlinson, Anal Sex, Comeplay, Enemies With Benefits, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends With Benefits, Hate to Love, Intergluteal Sex, Jealousy, Louis in Panties, M/M, Miscommunication, Rimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:00:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21699652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/outropeace/pseuds/outropeace
Summary: Harry’s mouth felt dry just saying those words. What he had with Louis was so much more than a simple ‘fuck buddies’ situation. It was slow kisses in the morning between soft sheets and shy smiles, it was holding hands in the afternoon while walking and eating ice cream. It was breakfast for dinner, laughing and licking honey from each other’s lips as they shared goals and even some secrets, it was happiness, it was glow.To Harry, what he had with Louis meant everything. Until Louis decided it meant nothing
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 85
Kudos: 735
Collections: Bottom Louis Fic Fest 2019





	building me up (but buttercup, you lied)

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Polski available: [Building Me Up (but buttercup, you lied)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27896245) by [Hazzaczuwa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazzaczuwa/pseuds/Hazzaczuwa)



> So.... hi! First things first this fic was written as part of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest 2019 and is based on Prompt 149 (full prompt on end notes), I hope I did some justice to your lovely prompt! 
> 
> Now, thanks to my lovely beta, bestfriend and child, Brandi who fixed my chaos of fic. This fic is also yours. I love you so very much.
> 
> Also thanks to Melissa, Arelis, Elotis, Lucia, Alis, Nini and Baby Waj for also helping me and just... for be there. 
> 
> That’s it, I think, enjoy and thanks for reading.
> 
> CW:  
> \- Louis and Harry kiss/mention being with other people but nothing too serious to be added to the tags.  
> \- There’s talks about a diet/gaining weight for a role.  
> \- Mentions of wrongly use of alcohol

**HARRY**

Harry knew it was going to be bad as soon as Mitch brought a cup of his favorite coffee just because he “deserved it.” He knew it was going to be bad as he stared, unblinking, at a fidgety Mitch trying to find a casual position on his couch. Call it intuition or years of friendship, but Harry just knew – by the way he scratched his shoulder and how his left eye slightly started to twitch that something was definitely not okay. 

Setting his cup down, he finally dared to demand what was going on. After a few seconds of stillness and silence, his friend took a deep breath.

“Jeff sent me to tell you he has both good and bad news for you.” Mitch’s face was all types of worried and Harry couldn’t help but feel a certain amount of dread fill his body.

“What is it?”

Mitch closed his eyes. Yeah, definitely not good. “I can’t tell you, he needs to be the one delivering the news.”

“That bad?”

“Again, I can’t disclose that to you.”

Harry scoffed. “Since when do you use words like _disclose_? You probably just burned your last working brain cell.” 

“Probably, yeah,” Mitch shrugged. “I still won’t tell you shit, so who’s the clown here?” 

“Both of you are clowns.” Jeff said, entering the room, expression blank. Harry didn’t know if he was doing that on purpose to keep things at bay or if he just exceeded his regular dosage of botox… again. 

“Mitch told me you had some news.” 

“I do, yeah.” Jeff said as he sat down. “Do you know Yorgos Lanthimos?” He asked, straight to the point.

Harry’s heart started to speed up at the mention of the name. “I mean, sure, he’s only one of the most acclaimed directors right now and has also been named the Kubrick of our generation.”

Jeff hummed. “Well… how do you feel about working with the Kubrick of our generation?” 

“Like audition for one of his movies?” Harry’s frown now turning into more of a confused smile. “It’s a very long shot, he usually calls the people he wants in his movies.” 

“Oh I know, he called you…” Jeff smirked. “Well, me because, I’m your agent, but he wanted you—“

“Are you fucking serious?” Harry quickly got up from his seat and walked to where Jeff was sitting. “You aren’t shitting me, right?” He grabbed him by the shirt. “Jeff, if you’re joking, man, I swear I’ll punch you right in the face, I don’t care, you can’t play with shit like that!”

“Let go! This shirt is expensive.” Jeff groaned, annoyed. “I’m not playing,” he said as he fixed his shirt. “He thinks you’d be perfect for his new movie.”

Harry’s grin was so wide he felt it pinched in his cheeks. “This is it, this is what we were waiting for! No more dumb rom-coms for me, they will finally see all of my potential,” he said as he smiled bashfully. “How much acting really means to me.” 

“Yeah, about that...” Jeff shifted in his seat and crossed his legs and arms. “Remember there was good _and_ bad news?” 

“Oh no…”

“Oh yes… the movie?” Jeff waited for Harry to nod in agreement. “He wants to make a dystopian rom-com.” 

_“A rom-com?”_ Harry snorted. He was sure Jeff had to be joking, there was no way what he said could be true, but at the sight of a worried Mitch biting his nails, he knew he wasn’t. “Y-Yorgos? Are you—are you sure?”

“Very,” Mitch jumped in the middle of the conversation. “He’s also very excited and can’t wait for you to meet Louis Tomlinson. Did Jeff mention Louis Tomlinson is in the movie too? Because he is, Louis Tomlinson, he is, in the movie, I mean.” 

Jeff sucked his teeth. “I clearly didn’t, but thanks for bringing that up.”

“You’ve gotta be kidding me…” Harry whispered between a hysterical laugh. “Louis Tomlinson as in _The_ Louis Tomlinson who ruined my career just because he wanted to work with his best friend instead of me?” 

“Mhm.” Jeff replied dismissively. 

“ _My_ Louis Tomlinson?” Harry suppressed a yell. 

Jeff rolled his eyes. “Look, I get it, you guys have a bit of history together and don’t really get along, but this is a huge opportunity for _all of us_.” He especially emphasized the last part. 

It was way more than that. It had been two years since the last time he saw that little git. Two years since he betrayed and dumped Harry without a warning, explanation, or goodbye. 

Although, Harry has seen Louis since then. Who hadn’t? Louis was everywhere. He was one of the most loved and admired actors in the moment. They called him the Midas of the film industry; any movie he starred in got any and all of the nominations. 

Harry was fully aware and man enough to recognize it wasn’t just dumb luck or some supernatural gift. Louis was _good_ . He was _superb_ . He was an _‘I’m going to show you how this feeling is actually supposed to feel. Gonna show you passion that makes your knees weak, a longing that will make your heart stop and a pain that will run so deep, the air in your lungs won’t be enough’_ type of actor. He could make you love or hate him passionately with just a flick of his eyes. And in Harry’s case, that could apply both on and off the screen.

Louis was an undoubtedly outstanding actor, he was not so much of a good person. 

“It’s not as simple as _don’t really get along_ , he’s my ex…” 

“Love of your life.” Mitch said, stupidly snapping his fingers. 

“Yeah!— _No_ ,” Harry furrowed his brows and shook his head. “Fuck, shut up, no! He’s my… ex fuck buddy?”

Harry’s mouth felt dry just saying those words. What he had with Louis was so much more than a simple ‘fuck buddies’ situation. It was slow kisses in the morning between soft sheets and shy smiles, it was holding hands in the afternoon while walking and eating ice cream. It was breakfast for dinner, laughing and licking honey from each other’s lips as they shared goals and even some secrets, it was happiness, it was glow. 

To Harry, what he had with Louis meant everything. Until Louis decided it meant nothing. 

“Are you asking me or telling me?” Jeff said as Mitch added, “You sure? Because the other day you told me—” 

“We can’t work together!” Harry cut his friend off before he could say something stupid. 

“Are you really going to throw away the greatest opportunity of your fucking lifetime just because of a pretty dick?” Jeff’s tone was incredulous, almost horrified. “Your whole career is going down the drain! You’re only being hired for B-rated movies that not even Hulu wants to pay for. If you don’t take this opportunity, you might as well start looking for jobs in your hometown because it’s over for you. And I mean it.” 

Harry knew Jeff was right, that was his last chance. At first, he thought working on low-budget rom-coms was just going to be the beginning, something he had to do to get to the important roles. However, after accepting his sixth role as a clumsy teacher in a movie he’s sure only his mom willingly paid to watch, he knew he didn’t have much of a future in the film industry. He didn’t have the contacts or the money – he barely made enough to pay for his shitty flat – to actually shine in LA. 

“H…” Mitch whispered. “Come on, mate, maybe he only has a few lines with you and you don’t even have to see each other? This is your dream job, don’t give him the pleasure.” 

And that was how Harry ended up in Ireland – Sneem to be exact – sharing not only more than a few lines, but being the love interest of the first and last person Harry gave his heart to, only to get it back completely shattered. 

They might be filming a rom-com, but to Harry, it felt more like a horror movie. 

—

Harry was a professional; no matter what other people believed, no matter how cheap the movie was, he was as charming and polite with the director and producers as he was with the makeup artists and camera assistants. He always felt proud of himself for that, but there was something about the boy sitting in front of him that made him want to snap. 

It could be the bleached blonde hair or the eerie look in his eyes as he intensively looked at him, but Harry was two seconds from asking what the fuck was wrong with him. 

“Is everything okay?” Harry shuffled in his seat. 

“Yeah mate,” the blonde guy replied with a big smile. “Best day of my life.” 

A warm feeling spread over Harry’s body, that he could understand. He also felt like that wasn’t a simple first reading, but something that could change his life forever. “Are you excited to work with Yorgos?” 

“With who?” The blonde guy tilted his head. “Oh, the director!” He said, giving a gentle slap to the table. Was that an Irish accent? “I technically won’t be working with or for him, but I guess it’s cool.” 

“Oh…” Harry felt completely lost. “Then, why are you so happy?” 

“Mate,” the blonde Irish guy quickly got up, walked around the table and in two swift movements he was sat beside Harry. “I’m literally your biggest fan,” _Oh no._ “I own and have watched all of your movies… from My Wife is a Vampire to Body Swap. You’re a genius!” _Oh god._

“You watch them?...” Harry said, horrified. “I mean, willingly?” 

The tasteless blonde scoffed. “Of course I watch them. Everyone knows the B-Movies from today could be the cult classics of tomorrow.” Noticing Harry’s baffled, and a bit disgusted, expression, he started to recite every single B-Movie that has become a cult classic. “The Room, mate! You can’t possibly deny that The Room is an absolute cult classic.”

“It’s horrendous.” Harry said flatly.

“Exactly! It was so horrendous it turned into gold. How can you possibly hate House on Haunted Hill, Vincent fucking Price at his goodfiest, it’s literally one of the golden spooky films of the 50’s. My man Ed Wood? B-movie after B-movie, almost all of them are cult classics now.”

“Okay but—”

“All your favorite midnight movies, say Pink Flamingos, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, The Warriors, Freaks, The Evil Dead, all of those were considered B-rated films at their times. There was a reason they were exhibited at midnight or in double features.”

Harry’s head was spinning a bit, but there was something clear that he couldn't deny. Blonde Man had a point as big as his head. “I guess you're right? I just can’t picture any of my movies being considered a cult classic in the future.” 

“Reckon Ed Wood didn’t either.” He shrugged, “I can’t believe you shit on your own work.” He shook his head. “Never meet your idols, they say. I’m Niall, by the way. You’re Harry, I know, now shake my hand.”

Harry was doing what he was told when the door opened. And there he was, in all his glory. Louis Tomlinson. Baggy peach colored sweater, soft looking pants and a sleepy expression on his face that made his baby blue eyes strikingly contrast the sharp and cold room like a warm light on a winter’s day. He looked like a vision, so beautiful and bright that it overwhelmed Harry’s senses. 

Harry fought to keep his hands to himself. Forced them to avoid doing something stupid, like caressing Louis’ cheek or brushing his fringe out of his eyes. Or worse, pulling him down onto his lap and pressing light kisses all over his face, whispering how much he’s missed him, that the past didn’t matter, and that he didn’t even need explanations, he just wanted him back in his life.

All those thoughts crashed down as soon as Louis noticed him back and rolled his eyes at him. 

“It is way too early for this.” Louis huffed and sat down in the same chair Niall was sitting in before. “What are you doing sitting so far away from me?” He blinked in his direction.

Harry’s heart halted before Niall cackled and replied. “I was sitting over there but when you have _The Harry Styles_ in front of you, you have to say “hi” up close. Bit gutted though, he hates B-cult movies.”

“I don’t hate them”. Harry replied as Louis said, “Wouldn’t be surprised, he does seem a bit tasteless.”

Harry raised a brow. “You sure about that?”

“So he speaks…” Louis mirrored him and added a sardonic smile into the mix.

“You’ve been here three seconds and insulted me in the first two. At what time, _your majesty_ , was I supposed to introduce myself? When you were rolling your eyes at me or when you were calling me tasteless?” 

“I like that you used that _incredibly_ correct term to refer to me,” said a beaming Louis as he crossed his legs. 

“O-kaay.” Niall whispered. “I gather you two know each other? Or did you just create this beautiful atmosphere out of thin air? Because if it’s the latter, that’s talent.” 

“I thought I knew him but I guess I don’t.” Louis said to Niall without averting his eyes from Harry.

And _what?_ Being offended and betrayed was Harry’s job. 

“I could say exactly the same.” 

“Could you now?” Louis drawled.

“What is... going on here?” Harry faintly heard Niall say, but couldn’t be sure because at that point, all his focus was on the silent staring battle he was having with Louis.

“Nothing. Come over here and I might explain it to you later.” 

Niall was about to sit up but Harry stopped him.

“Now you like to boss people around? I guess fame really does change people.”

“He is my assistant,” Louis gritted through his teeth. “We literally need to check my schedule for today.”

Harry felt stupid, but he could still save face. “Why? Too big to check your own calendar?” Amazing, that was truly amazing.

Louis sneered and Harry knew that what was coming wouldn’t be pretty.

“You wouldn’t know about that, would you?” 

The tension could be cut with a knife. Even Niall was smart enough to keep his mouth shut. 

“I could eat the passion in this room as if it were dessert.” Standing at the door was Yorgos Lanthimos carefully watching them both. “Wouldn’t you want to do the same, Anika?” He asked with his characteristic thick accent to an odd looking man beside him. 

Harry was mortified by the fact that the first thing the director saw from him — besides his cheap movies — was a childish fight with Louis. 

“I wouldn’t want to eat any type of passion or feeling, in or outside of this room, sir, no.” Anika said with a blank expression.

“Devastating. I would want to eat them all if I could, but especially this one. I want to bottle it all up and sell it to people. They must know!”

“You will, sir, in a certain way.”

“You’re completely right, Anika, let’s forget about the screening, you both get the roles. You’re going to be blind for each other, I can already see it.”

“I never said that sir, and this isn’t a screening, they already got the roles. This is a first reading and mind you, nobody is ready.” 

“Needn’t get upset, Anika, this was both and they did marvelous.” 

Harry saw how Anika closed his eyes and took a deep breath before saying “okay” and placing his bag on the table. 

Scanning the room he saw how — thankfully — Niall was as confused as he was and sent him a grateful smile for making him feel less out of place. Louis, for the most part, seemed used to the director and his assistant’s antics. 

“So, are you both excited about your roles? Anika told me to ask this in order to avoid future problems. Though I do not see how I could face problems, if you do not like the script it is clearly your problem, not mine.” 

“I love it.” Harry told him bluntly and sincerely. Following the initial shock of learning it was a dystopian rom-com, after reading it for the first time, it felt like everything but that. 

Sure it was about love, and at some point everything was so surreal it felt like you couldn’t help but laugh at the misery of the main characters. So in a twisted way, it still could be considered a _very_ dark romantic comedy but in reality, The movie as a whole was a clear call out of a sadistic society focused on a molded type of love. 

Divided in two contradicting yet similar in essence acts, you find how the feeling of being pressured to find your right match and the feeling of wanting to strip away from all feelings aren’t as far from reality as you thought. 

It was absurd, it was real, and it was perfect.

“Of course you love it, it was fated. I had a dream once with Mr. Tomlinson, and shortly after, I created a script that will now become a movie. I called his agent, and here he is.”

“Here I am.” Louis said with a pleased smile.

“And he is perfect.” He added solemnly. 

“And I’m not gonna rebuke that.”

“I don’t think the word fated works in that sentence, sir.” Anika said with the same blank expression he had since he entered the room.

“Of course it works, Anika, you must pay attention.” Anika opened his mouth when Yorgos clapped his hands and said, “Let’s start reading.”

And read they did. 

Harry was struggling to keep his eyes away off of Louis, but not for lack of trying. He was aware that Louis was successfully and easily avoiding his gaze even when — as the script reads — they had to be doing so. But he felt drawn to the boy. The situation felt unreal, it had been years since the last time they saw each other, but Harry’s body still craved to touch the infuriating boy in front of him. 

“Excellent! Both of you did spectacular!” Yorgos exclaimed from his chair after they finished reading. “Loved the tension, the angst. I could almost feel the longing in each and every single one of your words.” Louis flushed; Harry assumed it was caused by the praise. “I need you to carry and treasure that feeling of despair throughout the entire movie. The feeling of you, possibly, not finding the person who compliments you, ever. The pain of finally getting them in the wrong moment, surrounded by the wrong people. The anger of that love being taken away from you. The resolution of getting it back and then doubt! We need to see doubt in every gesture, every pore. Without a doubt, this movie will fall.” 

Harry could feel it all, that’s the thing. Right at that moment just looking at Louis. It was a bit overwhelming, how much he still felt for the boy. How much a single look from him could make his stomach flip and his heart race. But who could blame him? Any person who looked at Louis would probably feel the same. It wasn’t personal, it was just how Hollywood worked. They brainwash people into believing there’s no other person as beautiful as the one with the most success at the moment. And one of the most successful was Louis. There was no surprise Harry felt like that about him. 

It wasn’t personal, it was just the Hollywood effect.

After the first reading ended, Harry was still thinking about those words when he heard Niall calling his name. 

“You left your scarf there.” Niall said, pushing the fabric towards him. “Well, I don’t really know if it’s yours, but Louis told me to give it to you.” 

“You do everything he says?”

Niall sighed. “Look, mate,” he said seriously. “I don’t know what problems you guys have, but despite what you might think about Louis, he’s an amazing guy and he’s one of my best friends, so I suggest you back off with the snarky remarks, at least in front of me.” After realizing Harry wasn’t going to reply, he continued, “I asked him if I could come here because I really like your movies and he didn’t want to be alone. Now I know why. So it was a ‘two birds, one stone’ situation. You both clearly like to ruffle each other’s feathers and you probably have your reasons to be mad at him, but you both should try to go easy on each other. This movie has the potential to be big, don’t screw that up.” 

Niall clapped his shoulder twice before leaving Harry dumbfounded in the middle of a parking lot. He needed to talk with Mitch as soon as possible, or else he was going to lose his goddamn mind. 

\--

Sneem could be described as a lot of things; picturesque, cold, welcoming, but Harry would never describe it as fun. The small town counted with two bars; one was a coffee shop in the mornings, and the other was for what they were explicitly told, “for locals only”. The Inn’s weren’t so bad, but the actors didn’t have rooms there, so they still had to travel almost every day to Killarney to sleep and find some sort of entertainment. 

The first third of the movie went swimmingly. At the beginning, Harry was a bit intimidated by the rumors of Yorgos’ techniques and exercises to make people get along, but so far nobody had to pretend they were giving birth while being at the opera and for that, he was grateful.

Harry’s problems came after the second group started to film in the woods, and with them, Louis. They had a week to warm up to each other and then they had to start filming. He was fully aware that what Niall told him weeks ago was the best solution. He had to be the bigger person and try to apologize to Louis, or else their personal problems could ruin Harry’s second chance to prove himself worthy. And he’d rather die before letting Louis Tomlinson ruin something for him ever again.

He just needed to take a deep breath, to build up a bit of courage, knock on Louis’ camper, and apologize. Practical and simple.

“Hey,” Harry felt a hand squeeze his shoulder gently. “You seem a bit tense, everything okay?” 

Averting his eyes away from his goal, Harry felt part of his worries slip at the sight of Anton’s face.

To say Harry was pleasantly surprised to see Anton being part of the cast was an understatement. They used to have a thing, before Louis showed up for the first time in his life. It brought a smile to his face to remember how gone they thought they were for each other. Sweet, polite, and pliant, Anton was every man’s dream. And he was, in theory, perfect for him. 

To this day, Harry could said he was still a bit interested in Anton, but who wouldn't be? However, if he had to be completely frank with himself, Harry was more interested in someone who could challenge him a bit more.

“Nothing, I just have to re-introduce myself to the movie star.” Harry sighed as he rested his head on Anton’s forehead. 

Anton hummed. “Well, better to do it now that he’s alone, than when he’s with his crew.” He turned his face to look at Harry. He had such a beautiful grey eyes. “Did you know his bodyguard once stabbed a juice box with a knife just because Louis couldn't open it himself? His fans thought it was endearing, but who does that?”

“Wait, really?” Harry shook his head. “Either way, I don’t want to fight with him, I’m just going to apologize.”

“Apologize?” Anton frowned. “You? For what?”

“We had a small confrontation before our first reading, and I may or may not have said things I shouldn't have. I mean, he did too, but I’m trying to be the bigger person here.”

Anton smirked. “You definitely are bigger, that’s for sure.”

Harry let out a loud laugh. That was one of the main reasons why he liked Anton above all his other hookups. He knew how to make Harry laugh.

“Flattery will get you nowhere.” Harry lazily smiled at him as he closed the small gap between them.

“Are you sure about that?” Anton asked teasingly.

They’ve been flirting since they saw each other at the beginning of taping and Harry could easily use a bit of relief. He knew Anton would be up for it too, but first he had to talk with Louis and clear the water between them. He could be professional. He _was_ a professional.

“Meet me later? I really want to continue this, but I need to tend to a brat first.” Harry pointed his chin at the camper.

Anton rolled his eyes. “You’ve got him so spoiled.” 

“You have no idea...”

\--

It took 5 minutes, all Harry’s courage and a deep breath to finally knock on Louis’ camper door.

The room was oddly quiet but Harry was sure Louis was in there, he knocked again and heard someone running inside. _What... the fuck…_

“Come in.” Harry heard Louis’ muffled voice, sounding a bit breathless. Unwanted flashbacks of the numerous times Louis has sounded exactly like that with him, under him, made Harry’s guts twist. He still opened the door cautiously. “I was waiting for you.” Louis said and Harry’s heart stopped. 

The picture in front of him was as if God had hand picked one of his dirtiest fantasies and brought it to life. Louis was half wearing a rose gold silk robe, left shoulder out exposing golden and soft skin. Harry’s lips, tongue and hands itched to kiss, lick, and touch Louis, as a sense of longing filled his chest. However the feeling didn’t last long because again, Louis rescued Harry from his pointless infatuation just by opening his mouth. 

“Oh.” Louis fully turned to him with disinterested eyes. “I thought you were someone else.” 

And just like that, the butterflies inside of Harry’s stomach turned into tiny bits of glass cutting away at his insides.

“Sorry for crashing your party, your highness, but I needed to talk to you.” 

“Yes, yes got the memo we are sworn enemies blah blah blah. Until the day we die we will blah blah blah. Our spawns will avenge our lives and make the other family miserable blah blah blah. It will be our legacy.” Louis waved his hand dismissively. “Really, Harry, must we go over this again? I have to get a facial and not the fun type, but the very ‘relaxing and not leaving me with a rash all over my face’ type.”

“I thought you were waiting for someone.” 

Louis rolled his eyes. “Yeah, my facialist, dumbass.”

Harry felt like a fool, heat spreading over his cheeks. “You wait for your facialist half naked?” 

Louis’ expression turned cold. “What I do with my body, in my life and my space, is no longer any of your business.” 

“Was it ever any of my business?” Harry shot back.

“Of course you’d think that.” Louis’ voice lacked heat, it sounded almost defeated and Harry couldn’t understand why. 

It wasn’t as if Louis didn’t just cut all communication or ties with him even when Harry was still willing to talk to him and forget all about the incident. He just decided to block and erase Harry from his life. To this very moment Harry couldn’t understand the reasons behind Louis’ actions. He was aware he should’ve talked with him that same day, should’ve answered his calls from that night. But he was hurting, he felt betrayed, he needed time and space. Just one day to breathe. 

However, Louis did not only give him a day, he gave him two years of radio silence. 

If it wasn’t for Jeff, Harry would probably still be trying to reach Louis. Thanks to him, Harry was no longer in that place anymore, he had moved on. He needed to be professional now, for his own good. 

Harry took a deep breath. “Look, it doesn’t really matter what I think. We are supposed to be in love.” Harry saw how Louis eyes went wide. “In the movie, I mean. We need to be professional.” 

“I _am_ a professional.” Louis said through gritted teeth. 

“Well then, we need to try to at least be cordial with each other.”

“For the movie.” Louis added, his eyes searching for something in Harry’s face. 

“Yeah… this means everything to me.” Harry said sincerely and maybe a bit too earnestly. Louis’ expression went a little less cold. 

Walking slowly towards Harry, and after a few seconds of consideration, Louis extended a small hand. “Truce then?” He asked, tilting his head. 

Harry’s heart did a little somersault, he quickly grabbed Louis’ hand. “Of course.” _Please._

“Truce it is.” Louis softly shook his hand with a small smile on his lips, Harry didn’t want the moment to end. “Now if you’ll excuse me,” Louis said conspicuously. “I really need to get that facial, agent’s orders and all that.” He winked at him and Harry was less than two seconds away from getting down on his knees. 

“Sure, yeah– uhm… good luck?” Harry’s voice cracked at the end. _Fuck._

“Good luck… for a facial?” Louis’ smile was full and blinding. He moved a little closer.

“I–“ 

A soft knock saved Harry from saying something stupid. “Louis, are you ready?” 

Louis blinked at Harry expectantly, as if he was waiting for him to say something. Harry would pay absolutely anything to know what Louis wanted so he could just say it. 

After a few seconds of silence, Louis sighed and said, “Come in.” directed at the door, looking at Harry he continued, “See you tomorrow at rehearsals, yeah?” It was as if a mask covered Louis’ face again. 

“Yeah… yeah, sure.” 

—

After he cleared things with Louis, Harry was excited to join the Woods’ group, that was, of course, before he knew Zayn Malik – the other bane of Harry’s existence. Was that a thing? Harry wasn’t sure if a person could have not one but two of those – was also part of that group. 

He played the leader of the group, a ruthless man who believed that love was a burden for society and ironically tried his hardest to separate Louis and Harry’s character. 

So things went back to being a bit tense for Harry, adding to this, expressing what you needed to portray with no expressions whatsoever, it turned out to be a bit more difficult when love was supposed to be in the mix. 

“No, no, no, this is garbage!” Yorgos yelled from his chair, exasperated. “Harry, you are showing all your emotions in your arms, you look like that ugly green muppet. Anika,” he turned to his assistant. “What was the name of that ugly long muppet? The shamrock frog.”

“Kermit, sir.” 

“Kermit! Louis, you are too tense, too guarded. Are you scared of Kermit?” 

“Sir…” 

“ _What?_ I cannot be nicer about this, the only other synonym I can give is trash. Do you want me to use that one, Anika? Because I can... This is trash!”

“The characters are supposed to be stoic, sir.”

“Your mouth, is full of truths, Anika. So why are they acting like scared idiots instead of two expressionless _in love_ idiots?”

“I’m afraid that’s how they think love looks like, sir.” 

Yorgos face went from furious to heartbroken in a matter of seconds. “Oh my poor idiots,” He almost cowed at them. “Come on you two, come here.”

Harry hesitated but did what he was told.

“I’m gonna need you to hold hands in a platonic way.” Yorgos said as he grabbed Harry and Louis’ hands. After a few seconds he added, “Can you feel the passion?” 

Harry furrowed his brows. “I thought you said it should be platonic?”

“Then you are not holding hands properly! You should be in character right now, should be able to feel how much the other wants you just by looking at their eyes. Your body,” He said directly looking at Harry’s eyes. “is useless to me, it disgusts me—”

“Sir…” 

“Be nicer with the actors or you’ll get sued, I know, I do know. But they need to know all _this,_ ” he said as he waved his arms in the air. “It cannot be applied here. We do _not_ dance in cursives here.”

“I don’t think that made a lot of sense for them, sir.” 

The director blinked at his assistant. “How? I am being perfectly clear.” 

Anika looked at them. “In order for your emotions to be portrayed as the script requires, it would be better if all your movements were... _strong_ , precise and minimal.”

“That is exactly what I said, no cursive dances, tell them.” 

“No dancing in cursive.” Anika repeated, swaying his body a little. 

“Remember the person you have in front of you, is the one you were waiting for all of your life. He–” Yorgos grabbed Louis’ shoulder. “He, is it for you. The connection you both have, it goes beyond your similar traits or rules. I want to be able to see that connection through the big screen. I want people to sit at the movies, see your emotionless faces and bodies, but still say _‘I want that type of love.’_ only based by the way you look at each other. Can you give me that?”

Harry dared to look at Louis’ eyes for the first time since their director came close to them and instantly regretted it. Louis’ eyes were full of love, the most selfless and pure type. Harry never once in his life had wished for Louis to lose his ability to act — not even when everything hurt — but in that moment, Harry wished, with all his forces for that, because the look Louis was giving him made him _believe_ , made him hope. 

“Just like that,” A voice said from afar, most likely Yorgos. However Harry couldn’t pay attention to anything more than how his body was gravitating uncontrollably towards Louis. “Let me see the crave, the hurt, all of it.”

Goosebumps prickled over Harry’s neck as soon as he felt Louis’ knuckle hesitantly caress the back of his hand. He could smell the faint scent of his honey lotion, the same Harry loved to reverently and thoroughly apply all over Louis’ body.

“You need to sculpt Louis with your mind. Humm the sculpture.”

_What?_

“Hum? Like… humming?”

“Yes, why aren’t you humming yet?” Yorgos said, exasperated. “Just look at him, isn’t he the prettiest song?”

Almost nothing of what the director was saying made sense to Harry except for the last part, because even though it was hard to admit, he knew if Louis were a song he’d be one of the greatest. In Harry’s life soundtrack, Louis would be the main song, the one people wait for. He could totally work with that analogy. So that’s exactly what he did.

“Perfect!... See? You don’t have to move to sway. Keep doing what you’re doing for a few minutes more, I’m going to be around. Everyone else take five.”

After realizing everyone indeed left, Harry dared to move a little closer to Louis. Turning his hand, he slowly began to run his fingers over Louis’ arm, he saw how his lips parted slightly and eyelashes fluttered at the touch. It was the perfect picture of arousal, it stirred something deep within him. He knew what he needed to do next to get a whimper, with how much force needed to fist and pull his soft hair to get a gasp, where he had to bite to get a moan. The sense of familiarity made Harry dizzy with longing and want. 

Harry closed his eyes to gain some composure.

“Let’s go out tomorrow.” Louis whispered. Harry’s eyes snapped open, Louis looked expectantly and with a hint of… hope? But _why?_

Harry’s hand came to a halt. “Pardon?”

Louis must have seen something in his face because his eyes lost their shine and his demeanor became guarded. A stupid part of Harry that still clung and cared about Louis’ happiness kicked himself internally for being responsible of that. “I mean with the others, they want to explore the city.”

Harry’s heart thudded against his chest. “There's no city to explore…” Another kick.

“No, yeah, I know, Killarney is kinda small, I mean…” Louis let out a small chuckle, tucking his hair behind his ear. “I don’t know what I meant.” 

Harry wanted to remark there was no need to do that because his hair was short now and it only made him look vulnerable and a bit lost. Things that made Harry want to hold and kiss him until all his worries faded away. Made him want to reassure him that everything was going to be okay, because he was brilliant, that he still was the best. And wasn’t that unfair? Harry was the lost one, He was the one who cried until he was completely dry and empty. Void of any feeling, except the ones concerning Louis’, apparently. 

“Okay, sure.” Harry said stepping back. He was sure he was just giving in because he was never good at denying things to Louis when they were that close. “There’s a coffee shop I wanted to try.” 

“Is it the one where there's ice cream flavors based on emotions?” 

Harry had close to no idea of what Louis was referring to, but his eyes glinted again and no matter how much Louis hurt him, he didn’t want to be the reason they lost their shine again. 

“Yeah, that– that’s the one, it sounded... interesting.” Louis’ smile broadened and Harry almost forgot why he had to guard his heart against Louis. He almost forgot how good it felt to be on the receiving end of that specific smile. _‘I did that.’_ Harry _really_ needed to step away now, before he did something stupid, like smile back or beg Louis to take him back. “Um… I think we can call the other ones? Reckon the five minutes already passed and we need to keep filming.”

“Oh yeah, yes, let's… let’s call the rest, we– I think we got this now.”

As Harry started to walk out of the location, his mind slowly cleared and realized how terrible the idea of hanging out with Louis was. They weren’t just old acquaintances catching up or new co-workers trying to get to know each other better and Harry couldn’t even pretend he was only trying to be professional. That was him trying to please Louis and he needed to do something quick before he lost control of his feelings, again.

“All done?” A voice snapped Harry from his inner turmoil. Anton.

Harry saw the light in form of a blonde, tall, grey eyed guy. “Almost. Hey… a group of actors want to explore Killarney tomorrow, wanna join?”

“The popular kids offered you a seat at their table and you want me to be your plus one?” Anton arched a brow. “Why, of course.”

Harry could kiss the man. All was under control again, Harry was going to be fine.

\--

Despite whatever anyone might believe, Harry wasn’t the least surprised to see Zayn Malik joining their group. He also wasn’t annoyed to see him cling to Louis with every opportunity he got. Fingers intertwined, red noses brushing cheeks and temples, soft giggles. Harry wasn’t annoyed at all. He didn’t give a single fuck, he was plenty fine enjoying his afternoon with Anton, thank you very much.

“Louu, I’m so _coold_ ,” Zayn whined against Louis’ neck, in the spot Harry knew made Louis’ shiver. Harry was waiting for a reaction from him like a hawk hunting for its prey, but the only reply he saw from Louis was… more giggles. _Huh. “_ I’m so bored of seeing castles and more castles and even more castles.”

Harry wanted to snap at him, why must he complain so much? Can’t he just be grateful for the scenery? Besides, was it really necessary to cling to Louis like that? Jesus Christ there were six other people, including Harry and Anton, there. And sure, he wasn’t expecting him to act like that with strangers, but one of the other people was literally Louis’ assistant, Niall. And he seemed to be as friendly with him as he was with Harry, Anton, or any other person who crossed his path, so there was no need to not let Louis breathe. It wasn’t like Zayn was protecting Louis from the cold, he was just there, stealing body heat.

“I’m freezing too,” Louis said rubbing his hands together before blowing on them. “Wanna go to the coffee shop? I wanna taste the ice cream.” 

“You just said you were freezing.” Harry said a little more harsh than he intended.

“Yeah, and I’m also gay, so what’s the problem?” Louis’ snapped back. He had been like that all morning, Harry truly didn’t know why he even invited him if he was going to just be rude to him. Zayn giggling against Louis made everything feel so much worse.

“I don’t understand.” Anton said close to Harry’s ear.

“You can ask me if you want.” Louis said to Anton as Niall said, “It’s because legend says no matter how cold they are, gays would always be up for something cold.”

“I thought it only applied to twinks.” Harry said chin pointing directly at Louis who was currently making a fairly good imitation of a goldfish.

“Oh not cool, mate, that was so not cool.” Zayn said besides Louis.

“Oh please, National Geographic of the twinks, enlighten us with your vast knowledge about us.”

Harry was fairly sure he heard someone say, “Isn’t The National Geographic about animals only?”

Tuning out everyone else, he raised a brow and walked toward Louis, “Oh so you’re accepting you’re a twink.” 

Louis pulled a face. “First of all I am a twonk, I have muscles.” He said petulantly.

Harry lowered his head edging it close to Louis’. “I’m pretty sure butts don’t count as muscles.” He whispered with low voice and a glint of amusement in his eyes.

“Do you even know how anatomy works?” Harry saw Louis’ cheeks went from a pretty pink to a gorgeous crismon. “The ass is literally a huge muscle covered in flesh, it _does_ count as a muscle.”

“Yeah? Prove it.” Harry stepped a bit closer, he had no idea what he was doing, but god was he enjoying every single moment of it. 

“I think that’s just… common sense, mate.” Zayn said with a bored tone as Louis fumbled searching for his phone.

“Quote: _‘Your butt is made up of the gluteal muscles and is the most powerful muscle group in the body.’_ end quote. _Ha!_ Not only I am a twonk, but I am a powerful twonk.” Louis said as he shoved his phone towards Harry’s face.

“I don’t think being a twonk works like that, Lou.” Zayn said with a pout and genuine pity in his eyes. “But you have a really great butt.” 

And yeah, Harry wasn’t up to listen to that. “Didn’t you say it was a big muscle, as in one? So you technically are still wrong.”

“How I am– when you– and– I–”

Harry felt Anton’s hand on his shoulder before hearing his voice.“Hey, maybe we should go to that coffee shop you guys were talking about?” 

For a split of a second Louis’ eyes turned arctic cold before giving them an easy-going smile that Harry wasn’t really sure had actually reached his eyes.

“Yeah, I already know what feeling I’m gonna eat.” Louis said a bit too cheerfully for Harry’s liking. 

“We can take the other route if you want, the one I told you?” Anton said to Harry.

“The long one?”

Zayn huffed. “I don’t want to see more castles, I want to drink some coffee.”

“I don’t think they’re inviting us, Z.” Louis said, looking at Harry. 

“Oh… why not?”

“I think they want to be alone, mate. You know, just the two of them.” Niall said wiggling his eyebrows.

Louis snorted. “Anyway, you do whatever you need to do, we’re leaving.”

Louis was being a brat and Harry was itching to do something about it in the most inappropriate ways. How right was the person who said that old habits die hard.

“We are coming with you.” Harry said almost defiantly, daring Louis to contradict him. “We can go see the rest of the castles another day, just you and me, yeah?” 

Anton just smiled easily as Louis discreetly rolled his eyes, probably thinking Harry wasn’t watching him. 

“Well, let’s re-group and go there, my balls are going to fall off if we stay three minutes more here.” Niall rushed everyone, probably feeling how the tension rose out of literally nowhere.

After the initial shock of finding that Niall actually enjoyed his movies and called himself Harry’s biggest fan, he was actually surprised at how much he liked the guy, he even got annoyed by the same things Zayn did as Harry. He also realized that he was more of Louis’ friend rather than his assistant. A genuine one, the type of friend who does stuff for you not because you’re paying them to do it, but because they’re genuinely worried and want only the best for you. 

Harry couldn’t help but think how very telling it was that the biggest reason he liked Niall was because of how good of a friend he was to Louis. He might be oblivious, but not an idiot, he was aware of how much he still cared - sometimes - for the boy. But that was going to change, it needed to change, he couldn’t fuck this up, he still needed to think about his future and Jeff’s.

Or at least that was what he thought.

\--

With purple ice cream with black swirls on his hand, Louis still looked annoyed, and Harry knew the logical thing to do was to leave him be. Louis wasn’t his problem anymore, so he could feel whatever he wanted. But Harry never said he was the most logical man in the world.

“Okay, spill, Tomlinson, what’s getting your knickers in a twist?” Harry sat in the seat next to Louis’ while the others kept picking their food. “Didn’t you like the flavor you chose?”

“The ice cream is delicious, I happen to have a fantastic taste so it was only logical that also would be applied to ice cream flavors based on emotions.” 

Harry suppressed a smile. _God dammit,_ this was a really bad idea. “What emotion did you pick?”

“Wouldn't you like to know?” Louis drawled. 

And okay, that was enough. Harry was trying to be nice and Louis was being a spoiled brat, yet again. As if he wasn’t aware of what that could do to Harry's insides.

“Can you stop treating me like I kicked your puppy? I thought we had a truce.”

“I said truce, it didn’t mean I was going to start licking your ass.” Louis’ smile was fake innocent, but with a hint of privacy, it was... problematic. 

However, Harry also could be… problematic too. “Of course not, after all, that was always _my_ job.”

Louis’s smile faltered for a second before turning devilish. “Didn’t hear you complain about it.” He said before licking a droplet of ice cream that was rolling down his hand. 

“Oh believe me, the last thing I wanted was to complain. Actually,” Harry said close to Louis’ ear. “one of my favorite things was suck—”

“Hey,” Said a smiling Anton, sitting in front of him. “didn’t know what you liked, so I got you a cream puff.”

“Oh goody!” Louis said with an overly cheerful tone, “Harry was just telling me how much he’d love to eat one of those, sucking all the cream out of it and all that,” He turned to face Harry, eyes full of mischief and a bit of ice cream on his bottom lip. “right, H?”

Harry was really glad he wasn’t drinking or eating anything in that moment, saving himself from choking.

“Who wants to suck what?” Asked Zayn coming closer with Niall in tow. “Look, Lou, I got ‘Surprise’ but it only tastes like lemon, blueberry and mint, isn’t that so not surprising?” For the first time Harry felt grateful for Zayn’s presence. “You have a bit of ice cream here... let me..” He said as he easily wiped Louis’ lip with his thumb to then suck it. Harry’s feelings of gratefulness over Zayn quickly disappeared after that. “It tastes a bit bitter.”

“I think it’s ‘cause of the coffee.” Louis said shifting in his seat, his face was relaxed, but his voice had a weird tone in it.

“Did you pick bitterness? Because it’d fit with your humor this morning.” Harry said, body relaxing against the back of his seat, arm unconsciously resting over Louis’ chair.

Louis fake laughed. “No, I picked boredom, I was picturing your face while I chose it.”

Harry raised a brow. “Like to picture my face a lot?”

“Kids, kids,” Niall clapped his hands to get their attention. “be nice to each other, this is a family friendly place. Now tell me,” he said, looking at Anton and the rest of the actors. “Why are you lot staying in different hotels? Too cool to hang with the nerds?” 

“More like ‘not cool enough to hangout with the A-listers.” One of the actors – Michael – said with a playful smile on his face. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” He said waving his hand, probably noticing the distressed and worried faces of Louis and Zayn. “I think it was a pretty much random decision. We all are scattered in different hotels in the town and knowing Yorgos, he probably chose where each of us were staying by playing darts or something.” 

“He _is_ an odd one.” Niall said laughing. “I like him. I saw the other day a bunch of people dancing with no music on. What even _was_ that?”

“It was part of a sequence, we are supposed to be listening to electronic music.” Said Ariane, the actress who played the maid, with a thick french accent. “Emphasis in _‘supposed_ ’ because the discmans they gave us to ‘listen’ to the music with were just props, so what you saw were a bunch of actors and extras pretending to listen to the same song.”

“I’m just glad you all chose to be actors instead of dancers.” Niall said as the entire table laughed. 

After that, the conversation flowed easily. They talked about pretty much anything, some of them, at some point, highlighting how cool and surprising was to find out how ‘humble’ Louis was. Apparently people nowadays just needed a celebrity to not spit in their faces to call them words like ‘humble’ and ‘down to earth’, the bar clearly on the floor.

Even though Harry couldn't deny, Louis _was_ always cordial and tried to make every single part of the cast and crew at ease. Just the other day, Harry saw him calm an extra down after Yorgos screamed about her face being too nice for a person without love in the future. People somehow trusted Louis, loved him. 

However, Harry knew better than them, he knew the real Louis. He was an actor in all the sense of the word, he might’ve fooled them all, but not Harry. At least not anymore.

“We definitely should try to do this again!” Zayn said as they were walking to get their respective cabs. “Maybe without the castles part, that was a bit boring, no offence.” He looked at Harry and Anton not looking sorry at all.

Anton dismissed the comment and turned to Harry. “There’s a small festival this weekend… maybe we should go?”

“Is he… inviting all of us or…” Zayn said as Louis snorted. Harry was struggling not to snap at the both of them.

“Oh of course, of course.” Anton said with alarmed eyes. “I just– of course, you all are invited.” He ended with a sheepish smile.

“It’s settled then. Now chop chop,” Niall snapped his fingers. “Everyone pick your cabs, cause it’s getting late and this prince needs his beauty sleep.” 

“God forbid, Prince Louis doesn’t get his 8 hours of sleep, or the world might end.” Harry almost sneered.

“Um… I was talking about me, mate?” Harry’s guilt spiked as he saw Niall’s confused eyes, Zayn’s annoyed ones and a small trace of hurt on Louis’.

“I–” Harry tried before Louis shut him down with a dismissively, “He keeps thinking I’m part of the royal family and I honest to god cannot blame him.” He shrugged.

Strained laughs could be heard within the group, the tension that arose minutes ago almost disappearing, Zayn being the only one still looking at Harry as if he was planning to elaborate his murder.

After that, everyone started to hop into their respective cabs, and it was just then when he realized the only ones staying at The Dunloe were Louis and himself. _Fuck._ For a moment he thought Niall being Louis’ assistant meant he needed to be close to him at all times, but as soon as he jumped into Zayn’s taxi, his hopes crashed and burned, epically.

“Well, I’m leaving,” Anton smiled at Harry. “This was really fun, I really hope we can repeat it this weekend.” He said with flushed cheeks before giving Harry a small kiss close the edge of his mouth.

“That was… interesting.” Louis said as soon as Anton’s cab started to leave.

Harry sighed and climbed into their own taxi without sparing a glance at Louis. “We need to get back to the hotel, come on.”

“Of course,” Louis said with a solemn tone after he sat beside Harry. “After a hot kiss like that, you probably need some... relief as soon as possible.” Harry turned to face him to find a blank stare that quickly dissolved into a fit of giggles.

Harry would snap at Louis if he wasn’t so busy suppressing a smile and his want to kiss him.

“Do shut up, brat.” Harry said jokingly. “Or you’ll get punished.” He added, because force of habit, because it was late, Louis was smiling at him and everything felt lighter, because Harry was a dumbass. “I—” He stopped, unable to find anything coherent to say.. 

Street lights prettily showcased Louis’ blown pupils and rosy cheeks. “You wish.” He said in a whisper.

And how right he was, Harry thought as his hands tightly gripped his legs to avoid touching the boy beside him. To avoid thinking about how many nights he bit the hours, repeating his name as he tried to forget his voice, his body, and the faces he made that last morning. How until a few months ago, Harry missed him from when his day started until it finished.

It was then when it hit him, the only reason why he stopped missing Louis was because Louis was now there.

\--

Days passed by in a blur of work and grey days. Harry was aware that slowly, but surely, Louis and him were creating a certain type of routine based in light banter, lunches together – only cause it was a practical thing to do, not because Harry actually wanted to spend his lunch breaks watching Louis smile every time he bit something he really liked or how his face light up telling him stories about his siblings or his mom, not at all. – and rehearsing lines in each other’s room. Again, only for the sake of practicality, don’t get any wrong ideas. 

Honest, Harry never planned to have Louis laid down in his bed, legs up, eyes fluttering... _reading_ their script. It just kinda happened, one day he heard a knock on his door, and there was Louis. What Harry was supposed to do? Shut the door on his nose? No, he was way too mature for that. Way too above that childish behavior. Besides, they were always good at that. Rehearsing lines… playing dumb.

“Hey,” Louis said across from Harry as he nudged his hip with his foot. “Are you changing for our date with Anton?” he wiggled his eyebrows before his tone turned a bit judgemental. “Please don’t tell me you’re going like this?” 

Harry caught Louis’ foot and pulled his big toe, causing him to yelp through his laugh kicking Harry’s leg in the process. “Ow...” He said as he rubbed his thigh. “As far as I know, _I_ have a date with Anton, your friend invited himself and you lot to it.”

“Do you want me to stay?” Louis arched a brow as if he were challenging Harry to something, but his tone felt somehow vulnerable, sincere. 

“No,” Harry tried to sound disinterested. “I mean, you already told me all the things you want to eat and buy like a hundred times.”

Louis smile was big and blinding and made Harry’s heart flutter.

“You’re so good to me,” He said batting his eyelashes rapidly. “I promise I’ll be _sooo_ nice.” 

Harry threw a pillow at him. “I haven’t seen you this excited about anything like this since a long time ago.” He didn’t mean for it to sound as an accusation, nonetheless it did.

“I get plenty excited,” Louis sniffed petulant. “It’s really not my fault you haven’t had the privilege of watching it happen lately.”

Harry knew it was a joke, but that didn’t stop it from hurting. “Maybe if you stopped being an arrogant diva who gets mad every time something doesn’t turn out in your favor…” He said with a sardonic tone. He was aware it was too late to take it back and he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to take it back. Taking in mind the extents he took to indulge one of his whims, he wasn’t so wrong in his description.

Louis’ eyes snapped at Harry’s, face twisting into a painful look before recovering and going back to that blank face Harry so much disliked. “Maybe if you stopped being an insufferable twat who finds a problem in every single thing I say and do…” Harry was about to snap back but Louis quickly got up and began to look for his shoes. “You know what? You’re right, we shouldn’t go to your date with your— with Anton. You clearly don’t want us there and that will only create more problems.” All the air left Harry’s lungs. 

_What?_

“But—wait, no… You wanted to go to the fair, you wanted to eat the cotton candy taco, buy things for your family.” Harry said as he got up and followed Louis through the room until they reached the door. “You were excited about this, come on, don’t be like this.”

Louis paused, putting a hand on the doorknob before turning around to face Harry. “Oh no, you’ve got it all wrong, I _will_ go to the carnival and I’ll buy things for my family and then I’ll try whatever I please,” He said opening the door. “I’ll just do all of that without you annoying or judging me.” And then he slammed the door right in Harry’s face.

\--

Four hours and a bunch of food stands later, Harry was standing in the entrance of a club waiting for Anton to finish his phone call with whoever invited him to that place. To be completely honest, the last thing Harry wanted to do was to be there, but after the dull afternoon he gave Anton, the least he could do for the boy was invite him to a few drinks. 

It wasn’t as if Anton was boring, no. The problem was Louis. _Yes_ , Louis. Well… maybe also Harry but _mostly_ Louis. Because if he hadn’t just stormed out of Harry’s room like the brat he was, Harry wouldn’t have spent all afternoon looking out for him in the festival, completely ignoring Anton in the process. 

Needless to say he didn’t find Louis, but Harry decided around 7:57pm–yes, _exactly_ at 7:57– that it was for the best. Being close to Louis was making Harry feel things he shouldn’t. Inconvenient feelings. 

Anton grabbed Harry’s hand pulling him out from his own thoughts. “They’re all in the VIP section.” He rolled his eyes before turning to the bouncer, flashing him a sweet smile. It was a matter of seconds before he let them both in. 

Harry didn’t dare to ask who was inside, but he could easily suspect who _they_ were. 

The club wasn’t crawled and Harry could easily spot Zayn already glaring at him in his booth. It was interesting how Malik’s blank stares when they met turned into wary ones to finally reach to the point of where people around them realized the dislike was not only from Harry’s part, but mutual. 

“Where’s the rest?” Anton voiced the same question Harry was making himself when they reached the group. 

_‘Where’s Louis?’_

“Louis is dancing, hope no one ruins his night...” Zayn pointedly said looking directly at Harry. “He deserves to relax and have some fun.”

“I mean, just look at him,” Ben pointed at the dancefloor. “I reckon he’s having plenty of fun.” He said laughing as Harry’s gaze followed where his chin pointed. 

Louis was surrounded by two girls and a buff guy, having the time of his life. The girl were keeping their distance admiring the view while the man was admiring Louis with his hands. There was a powerful aura over him, maybe it was his size, maybe it was the muscles, maybe it was the fact that Louis was freely and openly letting him touch him. He noticed the man was smiling at Louis, it wasn’t a predatory smile, it was a bit goofy, almost too fond considering the way they were filthy grinding against each other. Harry knew that smile, saw it in the mirror every time Louis left his apartment a few years ago, he could even see the ghost of it every time Louis left his hotel room. 

_‘He’s got you wrapped around his little finger.’_

Harry’s stomach curled as his chest constricted. Averting his eyes from them, he excused himself and went to the bathroom. He should leave, he wasn’t prepared to see Louis kiss other people and was smart enough to not drink himself to numb the pain, that never worked and he just ended up feeling like a fool. 

Harry jolted at the sound of the bathroom door opening behind him.

A humorless laugh escaped from Harry as soon as he saw Louis strode past him to the urinals. 

“Something funny?” Louis drawled, back facing Harry.

“No, not really.” Harry’s neck had grown hot in the silence that followed. God, he really should leave. Why wasn’t he leaving? “Are you going home with the buff guy out there?”

_Jesus fucking Christ…._

“Ew, do you think that’s an appropriate thing to ask your ex-boyfriend in a bathroom? Someone ought to teach you about small talk etiquette or something.”

Harry was meant to reply something snarky, he was sure of that, but his brain stops working after hearing the word ‘boyfriend’ coming out of Louis’ mouth. Harry couldn't believe the first time the bastard admitted what they were was in a dirty bathroom.

“What?” He faintly choked out.

Louis turned and rolled his eyes at Harry. “Small talk etiquette, will you tell me that’s also a Hollywood bullshit thing as well? I don’t even live in LA, so maybe stop with th–”

“Ex what?” Harry repeated over Louis.

Louis tilted his head then frowned. “Boyfriends?... Are you gonna say we weren’t boyfriends back then?”

“I– We… _Yes_ , we were. Weren’t we, boyfriends, I mean. We were boyfriends, yes.” Harry babbled, heart beating fast against his chest. 

_God, they were boyfriends._

“Why are you smiling like that, weirdo?” Louis said with confused eyes, but with the beginning of a smile on his face.

“Nothing, it’s just... we were boyfriends.” Harry could only imagine his own smile, bashful, big, proud.

Recognition hit Louis’ eyes, and a shy smile bloomed on his face, softening all his features. 

“We have a curfew, come on.” He said pointing his head at the door.

Harry frowned. “No, we don’t?”

Louis shrugged “Don’t care, I want to leave now, I’m bored and hungry, let’s go.” 

“You didn’t seem too bored with buff guy over there.”

Louis huffed. “Oh my god, you’re fucking insufferable.” Louis tried to sound annoyed, but he was still smiling so Harry didn’t take any offense. “Are you coming?” He said, extending his hand to Harry. 

And Harry could be stubborn and hard headed, but he also was very stupid for one Louis Tomlinson, so of course he took his hand and let the boy lead him outside of the club without saying goodbye to anyone. 

In the taxi, Harry asked quietly, “Where are we going?”

“To your room ... to dance.”

\--

“Are we for real going to dance?” Harry said, sitting on his bed.

“Yes.” Louis simply said as he synched his cellphone to the television.

“Why?”

“Because...” He sighed and turned to Harry. “We can’t stand each other,” He said walking towards him. _And okay, ouch?_ “and we’re supposed to be completely in love.” Louis now was so close to Harry he could see every single long, thick eyelashes that covered his blue eyes.

“We are kinda like robots.” Harry grumbled as Louis put his arms around his neck. 

Harry let him. 

“Robots who are in love.” He said as he started to sway to the music on the tv.

Harry also let him.

Their movements felt awkward, stiff, so he grabbed Louis by his waist and pulled him closer to his body. 

Louis started to play with the still damp part of his hair that brushed against his neck. Harry hummed into each caress, head falling against Louis’ shoulder and with a syrupy slow tempo he brushed his lips against Louis’ pulse point, feeling his wild heartbeat through his skin. “You’re such a good actor,” Harry said voice like gravel. “You can even control how fast your heart can go.” A splotch of color had bloomed up Louis’ neck and Harry had to close his eyes cause suddenly everything felt like too much. 

“Kiss me.” It was barely a whisper, but Harry heard it nonetheless. 

Harry’s eyes snapped open and searched Louis’ for a sign of regret. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah, yes, kiss me.” Louis eyes fluttered before adding. “Just to... you know, channel our characters.”

Harry’s stomach lurched, confused between lust and disappointment. “Oh, yeah, of course, yeah–” 

Before he could continue with his rambling, Louis’ kissed him, hard. Harry sank into it and all his fears disappeared. He sank into the feelling of Louis’ lips wet and open against his, skillful and slick tongue. Sank into Louis’ shivers against his body. Harry was free falling and Louis was pulling him down even more, holding Harry’s face, pulling him close. He responded as much, biting, licking, turning the kiss into a filthy mess.

At some point, they stumbled into the bed, bodies facing one another. Some part in the back of Harry’s subconscious was screaming how bad idea that was, but Louis felt so warm and perfect against him, whimpers igniting something inside he thought he’d never feel again, it only felt natural to just squash all the red flags.

Harry could handle this, he could be casual too, professional even. They were pretending to be in love, Harry could pretend, just for a night, that he didn’t feel the way he felt about Louis, that his heart didn’t want more than this. He could do it.

“Let me make you feel good.” Harry dug his hands into Louis’ hair and pulled softly, exposing his flushed neck, he sucked heavy kisses there, biting and soothing the same spot. “Yeah?” he managed to say, voice gruff and deep with desire.

“Please.” Louis whined before pulling Harry’s face close to his mouth. He kissed him again tongues sliding together with slick sounds as Harry unbuttoned Louis’ trousers. Whole body eager and responsive to each and every caress Harry provided him, moaning into his mouth.

They both were rutting against each other like horny teenagers, struggling to even pull down their trousers, too busy touching and moving. Harry would feel embarrassed if Louis weren’t in the same state as he was. Finally, Harry pushed Louis’ boxers low enough for his erection to slap against his stomach, head pink and leaking. Harry stroked his head with his thumb and smeared pre-come all over his shaft.

“You’re so wet for me,” Harry mouthed against Louis’ jaw, “but I need you even more wet.” He whispered against his ear before biting his earlobe.

Louis moaned an “Oh god” when he saw Harry’s hand close to his mouth.

“Spit here, _baby_.” The endearment slipped from Harry’s mouth, but he has no time for regrets when Louis is doing exactly what he was told, hips rutting against his, ragged breath hitting against Harry’s neck. 

Harry slowly stroke his spit wet hand over Louis’ cock as he felt his hand past the waistband of his own trousers. 

“Please, let me touch you.” Louis whispered as he fucked himself with Harry’s hand, the tip of his cock leaving wet trails of precome against his stomach. Harry lost the ability to breathe for a few seconds before tightening his hold around Louis, dragging out a choked sob from him.

“Do you deserve it?” Harry almost grunted the words against Louis’ mouth, pulling Louis’ trousers completely down.

“Yes.” Louis hissed urgently before biting and sucking Harry’s lips. 

With his body ready to get lost into the feeling of Louis’ teeth on him, it took every bit of self control to not give Louis exactly what he was asking.

“Are you sure about that?” Louis’ hazy eyes shined at the question and Harry’s heart flipped around in his chest. _There we go, baby._ “Because you have been so stubborn, lately , a total brat.”

Louis let out a breathless laugh. _My god, he was beautiful._ “I have – _ah,_ haven’t I?” 

“Precisely.” Louis felt hot on Harry's hand, maddening. 

“I– I guess you have to do something about it.” Louis hips following Harry’s hand rhythm. “Or should I ask– _fuck_ , buff guy to do it?... He thinks I’m a twonk.” He said with a mischievous smile on his face.

In a swift move, Harry had Louis on top of him in a matter of seconds. His desire, as soon Louis’ hard cock aligned with his, came out in waves so thick it made him dizzy. He doubts he had felt this ready to give someone every part of himself since years ago… since Louis. 

Before Louis could even form a word Harry slapped his ass, hard — one single stroke, just the way that made Louis’ toes curl. 

“You utter _shit_.” Louis grunted, head falling down Harry’s shoulder. 

“Ah, ah, ah.” Harry tutted, reprimanding but grinning against Louis’ neck. “Language….” He chastised him before ordering, “Take your shirt off.” Leaving a small kiss in the conjuncture between Louis’ jaw and ear, pulling his arse cheeks apart with both hands. 

“I’ll show you language,” Louis lightly snapped, taking his shirt off anyway. “that will leave a– _oh god_ , a mark.” Louis’ voice broke at the last part, slick cock grinding against Harry’s as wet noises filled the room. 

“You sound like you like the idea of that.” Harry exhaled, hands trailing Louis’ torso up and down until it settled on his hips. 

Louis looked shamelessly beautiful, fully naked on top of a half clothed Harry, droplets of sweat trailing down his torso, blotchy skin, heavy lids and blown pupils. 

“Y–you wish.” Louis gritted out, making Harry tighten his grip around his hips. “ _Yess_.” Hissed, throwing his head back and rolling his hips desperately. 

“Baby, you’re giving me a bit of mixed signals over here.” 

“Oh god, I hate you _so_ much.” Louis moans against Harry’s wet lips.

“Feeling is _very_ mutual.” Harry then holds both their cocks with one single hand, trying to smear all the pre-come and sweat he can over them, it’s filthy, it’s perfect. 

The feeling of Louis’ thighs shaking made Harry speed his rhythm. His breathe itches at the feeling of Louis hands gripping his shoulders like a vice, surely leaving his mark on Harry.

“Are you gonna come for me, baby?”

“ _Harry_.” Louis’ voice sounded fucked out and Harry’s chest swelled with sweetly pride. He knew what was coming. Louis. 

Harry grabbed Louis’ neck with his free hand and swallowed his moan with his mouth. Suddenly, Louis hands covered his own around their cocks, mixing fluids, twisting, stroking, with a maddening cadence that was making Harry lose his mind. The tingling on his feet grew until it became a fire on his pelvis. Fire that made him want to throw words like _‘The best I’ve ever had_ ’ and _‘Oh god, I love you so fucking much. I missed your smile, I missed your smell, I missed you.’_ But that thankfully only made him grunt out a “Oh fuck, I’m coming.” 

He heard Louis gasp his name before slumping over his chest. With dirty hands and heart in his throat, Harry began to stroke Louis’ back. 

“I’m amazingly good, aren’t I?” Louis laughs, but it doesn’t sound sincere, Harry doesn’t know what to reply because Louis was amazingly good but he wasn’t only talking about the sex. He guesses too many walls were up to open up like that.

At a loss for words, Harry whispered against Louis’ damp hair, “Want me to take you to the bathroom?” 

Louis shakes his head. “I want to stay like this for a bit more. Can we?” 

Harry didn’t know if he meant to their position or if he also wanted to stop time, forget past mistakes and just… stay in the moment, holding each other, pretending they were in love.

Either way, Harry obliged. “Yeah, we can.” 

—

Harry woke up with the sound of the shower on and an incoming call. An automatic smile spread across his face as flashes of the past night filled his memory. He buried his face against a pillow – the one Louis slept on – and chuckled against it before grabbing his phone.

“Morning.”

“Someone had a rough night.” Jeff laughed at the other side of the phone.

“You could say so.”

“That sucks but hey, that’s life… Anyway, speaking of life, someone called me, they want you for a Lifetime movie. Think we should say yes because the buzz for the movie you’re doing right now is not really good, man…”

That was a very important conversation that Harry should put all his attention, he knew. But Louis was coming out of the bathroom with Harry’s jumper and joggers and probably not wearing underwear and well, he was only a human. 

After noticing Harry on the phone, Louis tilted his head and softly started to rub at his eye with the back of his hand. Harry was confident that that probably was one of the most adorable things he had ever seen in his entire life and he urgently needed Louis to stop doing it before he tackled and pinned him down his bed. 

_You’re only trouble,_ he thought as he saw Louis walking towards him, hips swaying with purpose, enticing.

“Thanks for cleaning me last night.” Louis whispered against his ear, leaving a small little peck against the corner of Harry’s lips. “See you on set.” He mouthed before leaving.

“Was someone with you? Who was it?” It took Harry a few seconds to realize what Jeff was asking and before he could reply, he kept talking. “I heard Anton was there. You should get closer to him, if you know what I mean.” Harry could hear the intent behind the fake playful tone on Jeff’s voice. “You’re interested, right? He’s very handsome.”

“He is.” 

“Well… he’s also an A-lister…” After not receiving any response for Harry’s part Jeff continued. “I’m not telling you to seduce and marry him. Just… it’d be nice if you were friends with him… for exposure reasons.”

“Louis is also an A–lister, much more famous than Anton.” Harry said for god knows what reason.

“But Anton didn’t fuck you over like Louis did.” Jeff’s tone was clipped and harsh, a tone only reserved for Louis. Same tone that made Harry finally snap out of it. 

What the fuck was he doing trying to vouch for Louis to his manager and friend? Jeff was right, Anton couldn’t be compared to Louis because there was no point of comparisons between the two of them. Anton was sweet and charming while Louis was… It didn’t really matter how good Louis seemed to be, how easy it was for him to pull Harry and make him his. Harry slipped up yesterday, but that didn’t mean it was going to happen again.

“Anton is good for you, Harry and I’m not only talking about the exposure he could give you. He’s discreet, he’s a family guy,” _So is Louis,_ his wretched mind thought. “Look, I didn’t want to put it in this way but, you know you’re not going to make it without a push, right? You have the chance to stand out for once. Anton is probably your only chance, right now.”

In theory, Jeff was right, but something inside of him – probably the part who was still lingering and thinking about the small peck Louis left before leaving and how he smelled just like him, – was telling him to not move so fast, to see what could happen with Louis, to leave Anton alone.

But he couldn’t tell that to Jeff or anyone. So he decided to lie. “Okay, let’s try and see what Anton thinks about it…”

“I might or might not have talked with his manager, she’s thrilled with the idea too.”

“Oh well… if he’s okay, I’m in but I still need to talk with him before signing anything, alright?”

“That’s my man.” Jeff said laughing triumphantly.

If he only knew…

—

Harry was all kind of annoyed as the day ended. Head throbbing and heart a bit crushed, he didn’t expect that seeing Louis and Zayn act for the first time would affect him the way it did. 

And in theory he was fine with it, sure, their chemistry flowing through the scene was kinda unnecessary if you take in mind Zayn was playing the bad guy. He also was fine with how unnervingly good they looked together, almost too good to be two loveless outcasts who hunted for living. If you asked Harry they just looked unrealistically pretty to have lived in the woods for a long period of time. But he was fine with it, really. It was that people could see how well they fit together, as if they belonged to the same puzzle, they made sense together. 

_“Are you seeing that, Anika?” Yorgos’ eyes switched from the screen besides him to the scene in front of his eyes. As if he couldn’t get enough of it. Fascinated with both Louis and Zayn looking intensively at each other. “Friends who share a soul, isn’t that fascinating?”_

_Anika hummed. “Maybe you should’ve casted them both as the main characters.”_

_“No, it would’ve been too obvious.” He said eyes still fixed on the screen. “I needed a love who could grow in the hardest of environments. A flower in a dessert. A shy beautiful secret.”_

And wasn’t it hilarious how life sometimes worked? Harry could’ve easily stayed blissfully unaware of that entire conversation if it wasn’t because he let himself slip the night prior. Because he dared to let go for a few hours and refused to listen to his friend. Because he wanted to see Louis a bit more that day. 

Now there he was, a few hours later, trying to avoid unnecessary thoughts and feelings. To avoid thinking how clear it probably was for everyone surrounding them that he wasn’t on the same level as the other actors. That the only reason why the director picked him was probably because Louis and him seemed like an impossible option. An unexpected love… wasn’t that what Yorgos said? 

Harry was two seconds away from spiraling but thankfully, a rapid sequence of knocks pulled him out of his inner turmoil.

“I brought different kinds of chips,” Louis shoved two bags full of different chips against Harry’s chest before going inside his room. “let’s watch solved crime cases, I don’t like the unsolved ones, I need some type of closure or else I can’t sleep at night.” He said plopping on top of Harry’s bed as if it were the most normal thing to do.

Harry blinked twice and closed the door. He needed to ask what the fuck was Louis doing sprawled on his bed as if he belonged there. If he enjoyed to confuse Harry. “You’re still wearing my clothes.” Was the thing he ended up saying. 

“Oh yeah, they look good on me, don’t you think?” 

“But they’re mine.” 

“Then maybe you shouldn’t buy things that look better on me than on you,” Louis huffed, “now give me chips and put on some solved crime cases.” 

And inner turmoil or not, who was Harry to deny something so simple to the only person he knew could make him feel a little better in those moments.

Mind a bit calmer but still messy, he realized something while he tried to stop himself from kissing Louis for what felt like the tenth time that night - he realized that Jeff was right about one thing. Anton used to be good for him back when things were simpler and Harry had more dreams than hunger. When there wasn’t Louis or heartbreaks, just warm mornings beside another warm body.

In any case, he didn’t even know where to start, even more when it had been ages since Harry tried to attract someone. Not since Louis at least...

Harry huffed out loud, “How do you even flirt?”

It wasn’t intentional, but the question was out there and Louis looked as startled as Harry was probably looking.

“Are you asking me how to–“ Louis cut himself off, took a deep breath and continued. “Did I ever tell you about the first time I fell in love with a movie?”

The drastic change of topics surprised Harry a bit, but at the same time he couldn’t care less because if there was something he loved more than to see Louis smile, was to heard Louis talk about things he loved, especially movies. He shook his head encouraging Louis to continue.

“I was probably around 13, the only movies I’d seen so far were the types of Harry Potter and Disney, and don’t get me wrong, I love those but the first time I saw ‘Lovers of the Arctic Circle.’ something clicked.” Louis voice sounds wistfully and a bit far away. “I had never seen something quite like that movie, the love, the photography, the dialogue... It was poetry in motion.”

He sounded vulnerable, as if he was sharing a big secret for the first time. “For the longest of times, I wanted to meet someone who made me feel that way. There was a scene where Ana, the main character, hands Otto a note that said ‘Come to me tonight. Jump through the window, brave one.’” Louis smiled to himself. “It was such a basic message, but I carried those words like a treasure. Jump through the window, brave one.”

“Are you waiting for your brave one?” _‘Am I your brave one?’_ Is the thing he doesn’t ask because he knows the truth would just hurt him.

“No, I’m waiting for someone that make me feel like the brave one.” Before Harry could reply, Louis chuckled and said, “But anyway, about the flirting, just… look them in the eyes, smile a little and that’s it.”

Harry was still a bit confused with the drastic change of topics and something inside of him was telling him that Louis was trying to tell him something with that story but his heart was beating so hard and his mind felt so hazy after seeing Louis so vulnerable, that with rough voice he only could reply, “I’m pretty sure that only works for you because you’re you and can have whoever you want with the blink of an eye.”

Harry realized what he said way too late, he was about to backtrack and go hide forever inside his bathroom, but Louis’ flushed face and shy smile made him change his mind.

Louis cleared his throat. “You’re not wrong.” he said, trying to sound smug, then he looked at Harry with big sincere eyes and whispered. “But you are also you.”

Harry tilted his head. “Yeah?” 

“Mhm, you can also smile and have anyone you want.”

“Are you sure about that?” Harry asked smiling directly at Louis. 

Louis smiled back and said, “Very...” before climbing on top of Harry, making all his worries fade away for one more night. 

  
  


**LOUIS**

Louis was a practical person, with time and experience he learned that there was no reason to duel with things he had no control over. He also was – overall – a very _nice_ person, and it wasn't only him saying that, no, his mom also agreed. And Louis’ mom was by far one of the smartest individuals he knew, so he absolutely believed her word. 

However, that didn't mean Louis was a saint because as his mom always said, there’s a fine line between being _really_ nice, and being other peoples’ doormat – see? An incredibly smart individual. – And sometimes, it felt the person seated right in front of him, giggling and flirting with Anton just wanted to test everything Louis was taught. 

“Did you know the creator of Daisy Brown is doing another ARG?” Zayn elbowed Louis as the boy hummed noncommittally, eyes still focused on Anton and Harry. “Or well… she’s helping her cousin, they’re mixing Instagram with the Youtube videos now.”

“What are you guys talking about? Otaku stuff?” Niall asked as he placed some weird drink in front of Louis. “Sorry mate.” He said not looking sorry at all. “Liam told me you have to drink this shit or else.”

“Or else what?” Louis frowned at the brown drink.

“I don’t know.” Niall shrugged. “He just said _‘or else’_ and hung up.”

Zayn sniffed. “And what makes Liam believe Louis is going to listen to a person who doesn’t even know how to differentiate between deep interactive ARGs that require a lot of thinking, mind you, and animes, that by the way, can also be very deep.”

Niall blinked, then turned to Louis. “Anyway, it has apples inside, I know you love apples.”

“You _literally_ watched 13 Reasons Why.” Zayn snapped.

Niall gasped looking horrified. “I told you I watched one episode in confidence, just _one_.”

“You gave it a stream, now probably thanks to _you_ , it will get another season.”

“Can you please keep it quiet? We’re trying to work over here.” All bickering stopped as soon Harry’s annoyed tone filled the room. 

“Since when is flirting with your co-workers work?” Zayn almost snarled.

Zayn was the only one who knew what happened between Harry and Louis, and how much the whole thing affected him. He was the one cuddling him silly until he stopped crying, the one who read him silly stories until he fell asleep. The one who pushed him to get better, to finally move on.

Because Louis _was_ a practical person who didn’t duel with things that weren’t in his control, but he also was a human. And the day Harry left with no explanations, broke Louis a little.

“You tell me.” Harry sneered at Zayn.

“What are you even saying?” Zayn’s voice raised an octave. “What is he saying?” 

Louis got up slowly. “I think… this is above us and we should leave.” He said looking at Zayn.

Harry snorted. “Oh so now _you’re_ above this?”

Thinking about it, maybe Louis _was_ a Saint after all. “Yes, Harry, I’m above having a silly and avoidable fight in the middle of a set, problem with that?” He raised a brow. 

Without waiting for a reply, Louis left the small space made out with couches and a canopy in the middle of the woods and climbed to the large camper that was his dressing room.

Someone knocked on the door and Louis played with the idea of leaving Niall, Zayn or whoever was outside there. Afterall, he needed a little bit of peace and quiet before filming his next scene. He chuckled getting up from his seat, knowing very well that there was no way of keeping Zayn or Niall outside. 

“Hi.” Said the last person Louis wanted to see in that moment. The word sounding fragile and shy and Louis didn’t know if he wanted to slam the door on his face or kiss him until the pang inside his chest lessened.

“What do you want, Harry?” Louis sighed. “Did you come here to keep fighting? Because I really don’t have time for that.” Louis put his hands inside his trousers so Harry wouldn’t notice the slight tremble in them, how much his presence affected him.

“I– No, I just came because you left this.” Harry lifted a murky looking juice at Louis. Remorse all over his features. 

“Oh… why?” 

As the silence stretched over them, Louis couldn’t help but notice the small love bite on Harry’s neck, the same love bite he left just that morning. 

Thing was, sex with Harry had always been kind of mind blowing. The type that made your toes curl and groin twitch just by thinking about it. So it didn’t come as a surprise that they had no problem with having tons of it. No strings attached, of course, because turns out, they could barely stand each other outside their hotel rooms. 

Louis was trying and failing to pretend the whole situation didn’t confuse him, he knew it was a dangerous game that could only end up with him wanting something he couldn’t have. 

“Niall said you needed it and… I don’t know.” Harry frowned, looking genuinely confused by his own actions. “I thought it was important.”

“It isn’t. Liam wants me to be on a stupid diet for a—”

“You don’t need a diet.” Harry said with an outraged tone. “I mean,” he mumbled, “why is he saying that? Your body is perfect.”

“Oh, I know,” Louis smiled easily. “He just wants me to gain a few pounds for a role so he’s fattening me up. You know, a bit more over here and there.”

“Oh,” Harry said with sudden glassy eyes. “Yeah, I... that yeah... I can picture that, a bit more here and there, that’d be uhm, really lovely… yeah.” 

Louis smiles as he closes the gap between him and Harry. “I thought you said my body was perfect?” He whispered tilting his head slightly.

“It is.” Harry said quickly and a bit fervently, free hand grabbing his hip, face getting close to Louis’ neck. Louis suppressed a shiver. “You are, I mean, your body.” Lips ghosting Louis’ jaw.

“And I?” Louis breathed giving Harry more access to his neck. 

“You?” Harry grunted. “You’re infuriating,” he bit Louis’ skin making the boy gasp. “and have to drink your juice.” He said as he squeezed Louis’ ass. 

“You just want more things to grab.” Louis mumbled against Harry’s chest, without thinking about the implications that’d have. That Harry would actually stay long enough in Louis’ life to see the results.

Harry laughed, those full body laughs that made Louis’ heart flutter. “ _Baby_ , I don’t know if I could handle myself with a bit more of this.” He said, giving his bum another squeeze.

And wasn’t that just so very unfair? People didn’t go around calling their exes turned almost nemesis ‘baby’. That wasn’t something you just said to your fuckbuddy you very much dislike. 

Louis was about to say so to Harry, but he instead sniffed and said, “I’m gonna be a twonk.”

Harry let Louis go and grabbed the first glass he found. “I thought you already were a twonk.” He arched a brow, pouring the ugly looking liquid inside of a glass.

“I am, but like more of a twonk. The ultimate twonk.”

“I think you’d look very lovely.” Harry faintly smiled holding out the glass at him. Louis noticed his smile didn’t quite reached to his eyes.

“I’ll,” Louis said before taking a big swig from the horrific juice. And just because he could, he added. “You _will_ see.”

The smile Harry gave Louis after that made the drink taste a little bit less disgusting. 

Just a little bit.

\-- 

“I just don’t get why you keep inviting the enemy to our parties?” Zayn asked Niall later that same day as he tried to murder the watermelon he was eating. 

They were getting ready to go out in Louis’ room, same place as the last time. Tristan – Or ‘Buff Guy’ as Harry called him. – was in town again and he invited them all to his club. 

“He’s a really nice guy when you actually treat him,” Niall huffed sprawled on the couch. “Maybe if you two stopped being so stubborn...”

“He hates Louis, so I hate him on Louis’ behalf because he is way too nice to hate anyone.” 

Louis sniffed, “That and hate requires a lot of time, my head starts hurting as soon as I think about hating someone. So much trouble and for what?” He shrugged. “I just dislike him and consider him my biggest nemesis.” 

“Your _biggest_ neme— you say you have no time to hate anyone, but here you are having a nemesis. You are aware of how that sounds, right?”

“I think you sound genius, Lou.” Zayn said before shoving a big piece of watermelon into his mouth. 

“I just don’t get what your guys’ problem with him is.”

Zayn dramatically slammed his fork on the table. “I don’t _know_ , Niall, maybe because he fucked and dumped Louis as soon as he got tired of him or probably found someone else. I don’t know.” 

Louis loved Zayn over everything and everyone, he really did. He was his partner in crime, his ride or die. But in moments like that one, the urge to kick his best friend to another planet was just way too big. 

“Zayn.” Louis gritted through his teeth.

“What? Oh… _oh_.”

“Wait, why didn’t I know about this? When did that happen?”

Louis sighed. “It was before I met you and it really didn’t last long so it wasn’t really a big deal.” _It was_. “Also, it’s all in the past.” _It wasn’t._

“I’m so confused…. did he cheat on you?”

“We don’t exactly know.” Louis replied as the same time Zayn said, “Probably.” 

“Wait so you aren’t sure about that?”

“What part of he ghosted Louis after using him and his precious, _precious,_ body for a few months didn’t you get?” Zayn fumed. “Besides we did check him posting very cozy pictures with another individual with our stalking account less than a month after he dumped Louis.”

“Do you guys have a collective stalking account?” Niall blurted.

“Is that the thing you got out of all of that? Yes, Niall, we have a stalking account just like every other person in this world, but we aren’t afraid to admit it.”

“Do you guys use the same account?” Niall said with a sad tone.

“Are you—“ Zayn shook his head. Louis just chuckled and rolled his eyes. “We do, yeah.” 

“Why am I just finding out and why don’t I have the password?” Niall pouted 

“Maybe if you weren’t a snake.” Zayn snapped, shoving another piece of watermelon into his mouth.

Louis cleared his throat. “I don’t want to disturb the end of this beautiful friendship but we need to get ready now or else Zayn will find a way to convince us to stay in and watch Wes Anderson’s movies all night.”

Zayn eyes widened in horror. ”I would _never_ do that to people I love.”

“Pretty sure you have done that to me before.” Niall said frowning. 

“Okay then, now that that’s all cleared up. How does my ass look in these jeans?” Louis said as Niall grumbled, “He made me watch that dog movie, it was terrible, but everyone loved it. I was so confused.”

“Your ass always looks marvelous,” Zayn said, completely ignoring Niall.

“Niall still wants the password of the stalking account.” Niall said looking crushed. “This friendship is so one sided. Who even likes that Harry Styles guy anyway, he's probably just one of the best actors of this generation.”

“See? This is why you’re never getting the password. You should say Louis and I are that!” 

“You _all_ are!” Niall threw his hands up. “Besides, the fact that I don’t like Harry anymore, doesn’t mean I can’t see how good an actor he is.” And before Zayn could protest, he added, “Louis also agrees with me.”

“I sadly do.” Louis shrugged. Because even after all, he could recognize Harry was born to act, no matter how bad the film was, he shined and made the movie worthy.

“You both are tasteless and don’t know what you’re saying.” Zayn looked at Louis’ ass. “Your butt still looks amazing though.” 

“Thanks, does it looks pattable?” 

“I always want to pat your butt, Lou.” Zayn said with solemn tone.

“You guys are so weird.” Niall whispered. “Wait… why do you want your ass to look pattable?” He squinted his eyes. “Do you want Tristan to pat your bum?” 

Louis hesitated to reply. It wasn’t as if he wanted to blatantly lie to his friends but he couldn’t exactly tell them he actually just wanted to rile Harry up to the point he couldn’t help but drag Louis to the nearest bathroom and fuck him senseless there. 

“Eh… something like that.” 

Zayn narrowed his eyes for a split of a second before recovering and fixing his gaze into something akin to disinterest. “Didn’t know you were interested in him.” He said.

Louis shrugged. “He’s cute.” One truth for one lie. 

Zayn hummed. “He is.” 

“He’s also lives in New York.” Niall wiggled his brows.

Louis knew that, to be more precise, he knew a lot more about Tristan, things you could only learn with years of knowing someone. Just like Louis and the man have done. Because the first time he met him wasn’t in that club, but at a dinner party 2 years ago. Louis had his heart freshly broken and Tristan had just ended things with his girlfriend of 5 years. Needless to say, they bonded immediately over shared tragedies and bonded even more five months later on top of Tristan’s luxurious bed. It was nothing serious, and both parts knew what that was and what it wasn’t. Love. 

Funnily enough, he was the closest thing to a romantic relationship Louis had since Harry.

They didn’t plan to meet there, it was a bit more of a faith thing mixed with a little bit of deus ex machina on Tristan’s part. After all, Louis told him where he was going to film, the man just chuckled in response telling him he had a club close to it. And that was all.

“This could be good, I haven’t seen you date anyone since I met you, besides some hookups.” His eyes and smile turned soft. “If there’s someone who deserves to be in a healthy and happy relationship, it’s you.”

“Because humans are required to be in relationships to be fully happy, right?” Zayn glared at Niall.

Niall rolled his eyes and chuckled. “That’s not what I was saying. I know Louis is happy and I know he doesn’t need to be in a relationship to be completely happy. But he deserves one, he deserves a bit of love—”

“What if he doesn’t _want_ to be in one?” Zayn cuts him off. “That’s the problem with this world, we live in a society—”

“Did he really just pull the _‘we live in a society’_ card?” Niall looked at Louis with horror in his eyes. Louis simply chuckled in response.

“—that puts romantic relationships on pedestals, that without them, the world wouldn’t be the world and humans wouldn’t be fully happy. Fuck that, mate. If Louis hasn’t dated anyone in months or years, that doesn’t mean he needs to start doing it now, because he _‘deserves that’_. He deserves to be happy, to feel happiness, it doesn’t mean that happiness should be brought by a romantic relationship.” 

Nobody spoke for a few seconds until, “Wow… that was…”

“Beautiful, Zayn, thank you.” Louis cut Niall off before he said something stupid. He got up and went to hug his best friend tightly.

“Alright, alright, got the point.” Niall put his hands up in a gesture of surrender. “I think… I’m going to see if the car is here so we can all… you know… go to the party.”

“Thanks, Ni.” Louis said, arms still encircling Zayn’s waist. “And thanks for wanting me to be happy.” Zayn huffed. “I love you both, I couldn’t ask for better friends.”

Before he could finish, Niall was running to hug him too. “You’re making me a softie but I love you too, sometimes I like Zayn too, but don’t tell him, I don’t want to boost his ego more.” 

Louis felt Zayn kick Niall in the tangle of arms and legs they were in. 

“Motherfucker, that hurt.” Niall hissed but hug them tighter. “Okay, I’m leaving before we all start crying for very different reasons. Please get ready soon.” 

As soon as Niall left the room Zayn pinched Louis’ bum. “ _Ow,_ what the fuck? I just told you I loved you. That’s gonna leave a mark.”

“Good, hope the cheap version of Oscar the Grouch, sees it, and his tiny dick shrinks even more when he sees he isn’t the only one marking you tonight.” 

Louis could pretend to be shocked but there was no case pretending he didn’t know who he was talking about. Zayn knew Louis better than anyone and it was frankly better if he knew what’s going on.

“His dick isn’t tiny.” 

“Diminute, almost invisible. I’d feel sorry for him if I didn’t dislike him so much.”

Louis laughed and shrugged. “He actually has a pretty huge c—”

“Ah ah, no no.” Zayn said waving his hand and closing his eyes. “If you aren’t gonna say he has a huge _cut_ on his very miniscule dick, I don’t want to hear it.” He scoffed and threw his head back. “I can’t even fathom the idea of your poor precious anus close to that tragedy.”

“Did– did you just called my ass ‘poor precious anus’?” Louis said completely losing it.

“Laugh as much as you want, a tragedy is still a tragedy.” Zayn sniffed. “Besides, don’t even think you’re off the hook.” He poked his ribs. “Lou, what’s up with you two?”

Sobering up, Louis ran his fingers through his hair. “The reason why I didn’t want to tell you yet, is because I don’t really have an answer for that.” He said sincerely. “Not for you, or me. I have no idea what’s going on.”

“You’re sleeping together, right?” 

A small wave of shame passed through Louis’ body. Not because he was sleeping around – he was a firm believer that a good causal shag could fix an awful night – but because of the person he was sleeping with. He cast his eyes down and whispered a faint. “Yeah.”

“Hey, hey, none of that.” Zayn grabbed Louis’ chin. “Tell me, how are you feeling, the honest truth. It doesn’t matter if you’re so far up his ass you can see his manager.” 

Louis choked out a wet laugh. “I just… don’t know? He– we have good moments, really good ones, where it feels just like back then.” Zayn nodded patiently. “God, we clicked so quickly and I was so stupid for trusting him so fast, just like I’m doing right now. I just feel... so much. And not everything is positive. How childish do I sound?”

“I think…” Zayn said pulling Louis into another hug, his chin resting on the head of the boy. “I think it’s okay if you feel hurt about what he did,” His voice was careful as he stroked Louis’ back. “It’s okay to feel angry and betrayed. It’s even okay if you have all these confusing feelings right now, positive and negative. What wouldn’t be okay, is if you shrug off what he did to you, just because he’s a nice dickhead.” He turned his head to look at Louis and then added, “or has a nice one, dickhead, I mean.” 

Louis groaned as he hid his face in Zayn’s chest. “You’re so awful.”

Zayn laughed and left a soft peck on Louis’ temple. “Neither of us are childish. He still needs to explain himself and apologize.”

Louis didn’t know if he wanted to say what he was actually thinking out loud, too afraid of how Zayn would react to it. But Zayn was safe, he was family and you have to trust family in order for them to trust you back. So he said it anyway.

“What if his reasons are shitty and I still want to be with him? What if I’m too weak and I forgive him anyway?”

Zayn went silent for a few beats. “I wouldn’t ever describe any of your decisions as weak. Dumb? Sure. Reckless and irresponsible? Maybe. But never weak.” Louis lightly shoved the boy’s shoulder. “Besides, if it happens, you will always have me and your mom to shake some sense in you. You would listen to us, just like you’re listening to me right now. We are a team.” He said smiling at Louis.

Louis smiled back. “The best one.” 

“The only one that really matters.” Zayn winked. 

—

The club it’s full of crystal lights, mirrors, and velvet, the music loud and pleasantly throbbing inside his chest and throat. 

Louis could feel Tristan’s broad chest against his back getting impossibly close to just hand him a drink. “Picked this one ‘specially for you.” Louis could feel his smile close to his temple as a heavy muscled arm encircled his waist. 

Tristan was colossal, imposing. Almost six foot four of compacted muscles. 

If this had been any other person, Louis would have simply scoffed and rolled his eyes, but there was something almost puppy like about Tristan despise his imposing aura that always made Louis smile back. He was handsome, built and had a heart of gold. And it was in moments like that where Louis couldn’t help but think how different his life would’ve been if he had met him before Harry. 

He could almost picture himself splayed out and messed up in a huge bed while Tristan did with him as he pleased. Powerful v-shaped body, hovering over Louis, pleasing him. He could give himself entirely to him, not because of his size, but because he spoiled Louis up to the point of where he decided to give his lover back as much as Louis received. Calloused big hands exploring every inch of his body, because Tristan was the type that didn’t rest until he knew every single thing that made Louis lose his mind. He could picture dinners at his luxurious loft just a few buildings from his. Zayn smiling fondly at them while having an easy afternoon. He could see his mom falling for the man, he could see Tristan bonding with his siblings. He could picture an entire life with him. He knew Tristan had everything Louis needed. However, the mere idea of a life without Harry made Louis’ insides churn.

“You look so lovely tonight.” Tristan smiled into his ear as the arm on his waist tightened and drew him closer. “I wish I could kiss you.” 

“Why don’t you?” Louis throw his head back, feeling Tristan’s stubble against his cheekbones. Showering in the safeness he felt around the man, always making sure to lower all his walls so Louis could easily come as close as he wanted to in all senses. 

“Because I’m pretty sure your boyfriend over there is at two seconds of killing me.” 

Louis sipped his drink and turned to face Tristan, avoiding to look where he knew Harry was seated and watching.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.” Louis bated his lashes with fake innocence. 

A wolfish smile curved Tristan’s full lips, making his eyes shine. “I know your body,” He whispered close his ear as expert hands traced his waist. “I know _you_.” He left a soft peck in his jaw. “I just don’t understand if this is a pre-planned thing between you two, because I might see the thrill of seeing another man touching the person you most crave for, while being unable to do something to stop it, but having the security that they will go with you at the end of the night. It could be quite alluring for some, not for me though. If you’re with me tonight, I don’t want him close, if you’re with him, I’d rather not see.”

“It’s not planned, we– we aren’t together.”

Tristan laughed good heartedly “So, he’s the luckiest man alive and he doesn’t even know it, yet.” 

“You’re offending me now, how is he the luckiest when you’re dancing with me?”

“Because you have been dancing _for_ him all night long.”

And sure, Louis might have done some of that, but never thought he was being that obvious.

“Do I look desperate?” He whispered a bit mortified.

“You look like you’re gagging for something. But he might have thought it was because of me.” Tristan winked at him with a mischievous smile. “Listen, I don’t want to alarm you but Thing 1 and Thing 2 just followed your man to the bathroom.”

Louis eyes snapped at the bathroom door, body running cold. After their afternoon conversation, he couldn’t picture any positive thing Zayn or Niall could have to say to Harry.

“Hey, I—”

“You have to do what you have to do, it’s okay.” Tristan shrugged as he held his hand. “I’ll be waiting for you.” 

Louis’ heart flutters as Tristan winked and kissed his hand. And for a split of a second he let himself ask _‘What if?’_ What if he finally let go? What if he stays? But as soon as those questions pop in his head, he shut them down. 

“I’ll be back.” Louis said halfheartedly.

Tristan gave him a small chuckle. “Sure, love.”

\--

The first thing he hears entering the dim lighted bathroom is someone spilling his guts out as if it were no tomorrow. The first thing he saw is his two best friends hovering close to a bathroom stall. 

“What the _hell_ is going on here?”

Niall visibly flinches, eyes startled. “I promise is not what it looks like.” 

Louis frowns. “It looks like Harry is throwing up his guts and you’re doing nothing about it.”

“Well…” Niall said, scratching his eyebrow. “then this might be what it looks like.” 

Louis turned to Zayn with an accusatory look on his face. The boy just shrugged. “Who am I to play god and save lives, I just came here to make Niall some company cause he felt bad for giving Harry some of what he was drinking.”

“You promised you wouldn’t tell.” Niall hissed.

“I shrugged,” Zayn held up his pointer finger at Niall. “That’s not a promise.”

“Snitch.” 

Louis huffs exasperated. “Can you make some space, I need to see if he’s alive.”

“I’m alive,” Harry faintly choked out. “please go away.”

“Are you seriously kicking me right now?”

“ I– _god_ , I don’t want you to see me like this… Please?”

Three “Oh”s were heard in unison.

Louis still frowned. “I can’t leave you like this Harry.”

“I’m okay, I promise, I just needed to get the thing Niall gave me out of my system.” He sounded so defeated, Louis hadn't the heart to deny him that.

“Okay, okay….. umm… do you want me to call Anton?”

It hurt Louis to ask that, to think Harry might prefer other’s man help before letting Louis in. To realize how far away they actually were from each other. But he had to, because Harry safety and comfort came first that moment. _Just for tonight._

Harry snorted. “No, I’m fine, I’m… yeah I’m fine.”

—

They stayed a few minutes outside the bathroom in complete silence, Niall looking all kinds of guilty while Zayn looked straight up bored.

“Mate, I feel like shit.” Niall said breaking the silence with a regretful tone. “I thought he could handle a bit of Poitín.”

“Really?” Louis snorted. “And what made you think exactly that?”

“Well... I don’t really remember right now.”

“I think Harry said so.” Zayn interrupted Niall nonchalant. 

“Yes!” Niall snapped his fingers. “Yeah, Harry said that at some point... I think.” 

“Whatever,” Louis rolled his eyes, but his words didn’t have any heat behind. At the end of the day, he knew his friends’ intentions weren’t evil, maybe they weren’t the best, but Louis was sure the aim wasn’t actually hurt Harry, just to ruffle a bit of his feathers. And ruffle his feathers they did, but at least Niall felt clearly remorseful about it. There was no real reason to reprimand them. “I’m going inside again.”

“Are you sure about that?” Zayn’ tone was wary and cautious. Demeanor shuffling from aloofness to concern in matter of seconds. “He said he didn’t want any of us there.”

Louis knew Zayn wasn’t actually worried about Harry but Louis himself. He knew he didn’t trust Harry around Louis in his best days, much less when he was feeling down.

It was Louis’ turn to shrug. “If he asks me again, I’ll leave, but I need to check how’s he doing.” 

Without waiting for a reply, he opened the door. Inside the bathroom he could see Harry washing up his face, sacked shoulders and tired posture.

“Are you feeling a bit better?”

Harry tensed momentarily then sagged just a fraction, not entirely relaxing. “Yeah,” He turned and said with bloodshot eyes. “told you I just needed to get that out of my system. It’s a shame I couldn’t even get tipsy tonight.”

“Do you wanted to get trashed?”

“Nah, just a bit tipsy to release some steam.”

Louis hummed, moving in closer. “Well, if your stomach is still up for it, we can go to maybe not get tipsy, but to eat something in your hotel room.”

Harry’s brows pull together, eyes full of a mixture between suspicion and hope. “What about Tristan?”

“Are you two in first name basis now?” Louis arched a brow. Still standing too close together, Louis can practically see Harry’s blood pumping through the vein of his neck.

Harry chuckled ruefully, eyes cast down. “After Niall and Zayn drilled his name in my head tonight, I kinda had to. I don’t think he knows mine though.”

“A real shame, you have a lot of things in common.”

“Yeah, I saw we have similar... tastes.”

“Do you now?” Louis snorts, half-mocking and half-fond.

“Aren’t you supposed to be going home with him?”

“Do you want me to go home with him?” Louis’ voice was barely a whisper in a sea of loud sounds.

“Louis…” Harry warned.

“Answer me.” Louis was aiming for an order, but what it came from his mouth sounded more like a plea.

Harry laid his head on Louis’ shoulder. “No, I want you to go home with me.”

“Okay.”

“Wait. Really?” Harry’s head snapped and looked at him with a bit of incredulity in his eyes.

Louis simply nodded. “Yeah, just let me say goodbye to him.” 

“That easy?”

“Yeah, some things are that easy.”

—

Louis spotted Tristan right away, dark brown skin shining beautifully under the club lights. His friends completely at ease talking with him. 

“Hey.” Louis said touching the man’s shoulder.

It took Tristan only seconds to figure out what was going on. “Ah… at last you picked him.” He said with an understanding smile.

“He–He’s not feeling so good.”

Tristan’s big hand completely engulfed Louis’. “You don’t have to give me any explanations, love. I knew what this was for you since the first night and I wholeheartedly accepted whatever you could give me.”

“Tristan–”

“Don’t give me that look. This is not a goodbye, I’m way too fond of you for that. We just need to learn how to be friends without me wanting to bury myself inside of you every time you smile.” Louis choked at that, Tristan simply laughed. “Not gonna lie, I’m gonna miss that part. But we will be fine, love. I’m staying in your life and you’re staying in mine, we will be fine. Now go to your boyfriend before he gets all ansty and gets the wrong ideas”

Louis squeezed Tristan’s hand. “You deserve someone soft and able to accept and deserve all the kindness you give.”

“Now you’re just trying to fish for some nice compliments.” Tristan chuckled as his other hand gripped Louis’ chin. “This isn’t about me deserving something you can’t give me – because you can and you _are_ giving me what I deserve and need. This is about you going for what _you_ want, because if you don’t do this now, you’re always going to ask yourself what if. And baby, I’m capable of a lot of things, but I cannot fight with ghosts.” 

His smile was soft and sincere despite the circumstances, and Louis knew those warm big brown eyes always were going to have a soft spot in his heart. 

“You’re the best.” Louis smiled back, eyes flickering down, fully aware of what he was giving away in that moment, yet feeling unable to not do this.

“Oh I know.”

Louis said quick goodbyes to Niall–who insisted Louis to tell Harry how sorry he was, several times.–and Zayn who whispered in his ear that he was going to be there for Louis no matter what.

Before opening the bathroom door again, Louis’ heart felt lighter because against all the odds, deep down, he knew he was making the right decision. 

Louis _was_ brave. Louis was going to jump through the window.

—

“How many times are you going to wash your mouth.” 

“Until my mouth doesn’t smell like something died inside of it.”

“Maybe the thing that died was your sense of humor.”

“Or yours.”

Louis rolled his eyes playfully. “Let me see if it’s that bad.” He leaned forward so his face was an inch from his. 

Harry closed his eyes and let out a small grunt. “There’s no way I'm letting you kiss me smelling like this.”

“Aw,” Louis said with playful tone, shifting even closer to Harry, hands innocently seated in his broad chest. “You care about me not finding you disgusting. That’s very sweet.”

Harry’s eyes glinted with fire and want, grabbing Louis by the hips with possessive hands. “I couldn’t give less fucks.” His mouth said, a full contradiction of his actions. 

“Prove it then.” 

“Wait,” Harry paused, and pulled the hands on his chest off. Louis’ throat got suddenly tight and his stomach clutched. Was Harry about to reject him? “I got something for you.” Shy words came out as whisper instead, he turned one of Louis’ hands and softly kissed his palm.

“For me?” Louis asked, bewildered as he saw Harry move and grab something from his suitcase. “Why?”

“Well…” Harry started. “Today, we reach 6 months of being nemesis with benefits.” Louis suppressed a giggle. Sure, he always referred to them as that, but one thing was saying it in his head or with Zayn and another very different thing was hearing it coming from Harry. “This is like an anniversary so i thought it was only convenient to you know.. commemorate it with a gift”

Louis blinked as he fought a smile. “I think I’m pretty sure nemesis don’t celebrate anniversaries, that’s literally the opposite of what a nemesis with benefits relationship entails.”

“Anyways.” Harry waved his hand. “It’s not much.” Harry’s face flushed as he handed Louis a simple pendant of what it looked like intricate lines with no end. “It’s um… called the Dara knot, it symbolizes a root system, most precisely the oak tree.” He said slightly frowning as if he was trying to remember as much as he could. “It’s a celtic amulet, the guy who was selling it said it represented strength, endurance and— well other stuff and reminded me of you.” Louis gulped amiss of words. “He also said it brings protection in difficult times and I don’t know how true that is, but you know what they say…” Harry trailed scratching his chin. “a little protection from the celts never killed nobody.” He shrugged. 

“I’m pretty sure nobody has said that ever.” Louis whispered trying and failing to avoid his voice to waver with emotions as something warm and bright swelled inside of him. “I _really_ wanna kiss you.”

Harry smiled sheepishly as he scrunched his nose. “Good thing I really wanna kiss you too.”

Louis pressed his body into him as they kissed, deep and hungry. The kiss felt different somehow, maybe it was because the gift or maybe it was because Louis made up his mind and knew what he wanted. He was going to talk with Harry, he was going to ask what happened and ask for a well deserved apology and if he didn't get any, well… at least he was always going to have that night.

Winding Louis’ hair around his fist, Harry deepened the kiss as he clumsily tried to undo his pants. As soon as his cock sprang free Louis muttered a small “Jesus.” 

“Need you naked, baby.” Harry rasped. “Need to be inside you now. God, I missed you so much.” 

Goosebumps broke all over Louis’ skin. “You saw me this morning.” He still chuckled.

“You know what I meant, I— just let me take your clothes so I can give you my cock.” Harry said as he delivered wet and sloppy kisses to Louis’ neck.

“To think just a few minutes ago you didn’t want to kiss me.” Louis whispered as he shimmied his skinny jeans off his body with one hand and pushed Harry’s head against his neck with the other. 

“I always want to kiss you,” Harry almost grunts against his skin. “There’s no moment of the day that I’m no thinking about kissing or touching you, it drives me crazy.” He said as he cupped Louis’ cock with his large hand, breath hitching as soon as he felt Louis’ underwear. Pale pink _sheer_ lace panties that engulfed Louis’ ass as if they were custom made. Louis knew he looked good in them, but the dazed out look Harry was giving him confirmed what he knew yet again. 

Harry backed a few inches from him and a dark look clouded his features. “This is the first time I’ve seen you wearing something like this,” Harry murmurs with an indecipherable tone. Louis heart quickens and threatens to break under Harry’s intense gaze.

_Does Harry not like it? Did he find it ridiculous?_

Either way, Louis felt gorgeous and nobody would take away how good his skin feels against lace, how pretty he feels.

“Answer me.” 

“You didn’t ask any questions, smartass.” Louis snapped, hands on his hips. He would not feel ashamed about something he loved. “So what do you want me to reply?” 

“Why tonight?” And Louis heard it, above the drumming of his wild heartbeat, the indecipherable sound in Harry’s voice was fear. But... why?

“Because…” Was Louis ready to lay his heart in front of Harry? Was actually ready to jump through the window?

“Was it for him?”

“For him who?” Louis frowned, genuinely not knowing what the fuck was Harry talking about.

“Him… Tristan.” 

“Tristan…” Louis repeated, tasting how wrong the name sounded in his mouth in that moment. “You think…” Louis closed his eyes. “I took _three_ hours of my day trying to think of which clothes you liked more on me, picturing your face when I stripped from them, imagining which fabric and color you would prefer… lace or satin, pink or red, I don’t know maybe fucking black, to just show them to Tristan in our 6 month fucking _nemeversary_!”

“Oh…” Harry was the perfect picture of a fish in that moment — mouth open big and round before turning into an almost devilish smirk. “So you believe that nemesis can have anniversaries too?”

Louis took a deep breath. “I swear to god, Styles.”

“Either way,” Harry’s eyes were on him, eating him whole. Driving Louis mad, making him float while he kept saying the stupidest things. “what you just said would actually mean something like ‘turning nemesis’ cause versary comes from versus and means turning.”

“I’m in lace panties and youre talking about etimologic terms.”

“It’s talking about etimologic terms or bending you over and fucking you while you’re clearly still pissed at me.”

“Since when do we care if we are pissed at each other? That’s what we do, we hate fuck.”

Harry got closer to Louis. “Not on our _nemeversary_ ,” He whispered, gently brushing Louis’ fringe back from his forehead. Louis’ eyes fluttered close at his touch. “today I need you happy, sweet. I need it to be sweet.” He paused between words, trailing small kisses all over Louis’ face and neck.

“It’s always sweet with you.” Louis leaned closer, nuzzling Harry’s neck right in the spot he knew drove the boy crazy. 

Wandering hands traced his waist, followed patterns of the lace, and cupped his ass. The touches felt reverent, as if Harry was touching something holy, green clear eyes turning forest dark and it was all for Louis. 

Louis’ breath hitched at the feeling of dry fingers pressing gently against his hole. “Please,” He said, arching his back.

“I know, baby. I’m gonna give you anything you want, just tell me what you want and it’s yours.”

Louis without thinking much of it, slurred the thing he wanted the most. “Wanna be yours.” 

Harry’s mouth and tongue were on him again in a matter of seconds, devouring him as if there were no tomorrow, relentlessly and desperately. “I want you to crawl onto my bed and lay there for me. Let me treat you like you deserve, let me be sweet to you, honey.” He said as he licked a long stripe on Louis’ neck, as if he could actually taste Louis’ sweetness.

He watched Louis like a hawk as the boy climbed the bed stark naked with his ass up in the air. “Turn around, baby. What’s the point of fucking you slowly if I cannot see your face when you come on my cock.”

Louis shivered and did what he was told. He watched Harry hungrily as he took his clothes off and grabbed the lube and condoms inside his drawer. The mere image of the hard arch of Harry’s cock made Louis’ own leak in need and spread his legs wider.

“Look at you, you’re such a beautiful thing, so sweet for me.” Harry whispered in awe, pushing Louis’ back against the bed. “You got so pretty for me, right, lovely?” Louis could feel the contour of Harry’s smile against his skin. “Cleaned up so nicely because you wanted me to touch you like you deserve, like the pretty flower you are.”

Louis squirmed under his touch, desperation throbbing in his pelvis.“If you keep babbling, the only thing I will want is to fall asleep.”

Harry softly chuckled, “Maybe tell that to your cock, baby.” he pulled Louis into another kiss before his mouth began to work its way down Louis’ body, kisses growing wetter as Harry reached his belly. Tongue tracing the outline of his soft tummy. 

Louis met Harry’s intense gaze as he sunk his teeth on the soft part of his hip bone, sealing his mark sucking and flicking his tongue against the bruised skin. Louis whimpered and pulled Harry’s hair, guiding his mouth to the most sensitive parts of his body, from his inner thigh to the left side of his pelvis.

After one single long lick and a soft bite to his still clothed cock, Harry was all over Louis, hands sweeping his curves. Pressing and rolling his hips, mouth open against his jawline, teasing fingers slipping under the thin elastic of his panties, still not touching his angry red cock.

Louis pulled Harry and let him fuck his tongue slowly into his mouth. Arching his back, he let out a throaty moan at the feeling of Harry finally tracing with one single finger over his neglected cock. Harry sucks a row of kisses and scrapes his teeth over the fresh marks blooming in his neck.

“Not gonna take this off, baby.” Harry softly tugs the material of his panties. “Gonna paint them with my come.” He said as he moved his hand inside Louis’ bottoms, curling around his dick.

Louis could feel every inch of his body light up with every touch, every kiss. How he was losing himself little by little in Harry’s arms. He felt something warm and wet trace the opening of his ass. He loved how Harry sometimes took his time opening him up, as if he wanted to engrave every touch in his mind, as if the only thing that mattered was Louis’ pleasure. He hissed at the intrusion of the first finger, mewled at the second one and fully moaned at the third.

Soon enough Louis was a babbling mess at the mercy of Harry’s expert fingers, pumping in and out him. Grinding against them, begging him for more.

“I think you’re ready for me, honey.” Harry said as he placed Louis’ legs over his shoulders, cock positioned against his entrance. 

Louis eyes watered and fluttered at the feeling of fullness, body stretching and readjusting so Harry’s cock would fit entirely inside of him.

“God” Harry hissed under his breath, hands spreading Louis’ ass as he finished bottoming out. “look at you, sweetheart. All pretty and open, just for me.”

“You- _fuck_ -you’re so full of yourself.”

Harry hummed before laying a gentle kiss on Louis’ nose and give a not so gentle thrust inside of him. “And you’re so full of me.”

Before Louis could reply, Harry lifted his legs even higher and pushed his dick even deeper. Louis threw his head back and allowed himself to cry out, making sounds he rarely made with anyone, sounds that only belonged to Harry. 

He felt tears falling down his face as the first brush of Harry hitting his prostate. He felt exposed, he felt cherished and desired. Felt like coming home... like coming.

“Fuck, I’m going to come.” Louis choked out between pleasure sobs. 

If he wasn't so drunk in lust, he’d probably feel embarrassed by that, but Harry’s grunts encouraging him to do so made his mind go blank as black spots blurred his vision and pearly white come covered his tummy.

Harry groaned before pulling out and mixing Louis’ come with his own. He shifted until he was laying on Louis’ stomach spreading and lapping all the come on his belly.

Louis’ panties felt loose and wet, absolutely ruined, and he never felt more sexier than he did in that moment with Harry. It felt like a dream, Harry was cleaning him like a lover would and Louis just wanted to stay in that moment forever.

So he closed his eyes and let his mind and heart wonder. That night Louis dreamed about green eyes, promises and soft smiles. 

**HARRY**

Harry never considered himself a morning person. Since he was a kid, he always needed a few hours and a bit of glucose in his system to actually start functioning without snapping someone’s neck. It was a habit he was desperately trying to change without much success.

People still tried to avoid talking to him in the mornings, not even his own manager dared to call him before 11 am. The only one who seemed immune to that was Louis, always giggling around him and delivering soft morning kisses until Harry couldn’t help but give the boy anything he wanted.

Maybe it wasn’t that Louis was immune to his bad mood, maybe it was Harry the one who was softer around Louis, no matter the time or the place.

Because if anyone could see him in his king size bed, face buried in the crook of Louis’ neck, arms and legs clinging to his boy, putting koalas in shame, big smile plastered on his face, nobody would recognize him.

They made a particular picture, big broad body clinging to a small one for dear life. But Harry couldn’t help it, he wanted to melt into him, live in that moment forever. With Louis in his arms, with no past, no tears, just them. Bodies fitting like the last two pieces of a big and complicated puzzle. 

Harry would deny this to anyone but that morning he watched Louis sleep for a bit. Letting himself imagine how would feel waking up every morning feeling warm and content besides the person he loved. Because after last night he couldn’t deny anymore he loved Louis. It was as clear as how close Tristan was to falling in love with Louis.

He saw it on the way the man held Louis almost all night, a mix between lust and endereament. Saw it on the way how he seemed fascinated by everything Louis said and did. On the way he let Louis go with hurt in his eyes and a smile on his face. He wanted Louis happy no matter who with or how. Harry also had clear, as easily as he let Louis go, he would come back for him as soon as Harry fucked up. 

Maybe that was the real reason why he let Louis go. Maybe Harry was as transparent as him, saw how besotted yet scared he was and saw no harm in letting Louis have a bit of fun before going back to real life.

However, Harry wasn’t going to give up so easily, he wanted to be brave and fight for what they had. Because Louis wasn’t his enemy, he might not know a lot about them, but he was pretty sure you weren’t supposed to talk with your enemies for hours and tell them your biggest fears, laugh with them, make love to them, you weren’t supposed to fall in love with them all over again. So, no, Harry didn’t see Louis as his enemy and maybe he was a fool for that, but by god he was going to try to make Louis fall in love with him again. 

A knock on his door made Harry snap from his own thoughts. The arm circling Louis’ waist instinctively tightened, he wasn’t ready to let Louis go, not yet. Maybe if ignored the knocks whoever who was outside would leave.

The knocks started again.

“Please, make it stoop.” Louis cried out against his hair.

Harry nibbled Louis’ neck. “Keep sleeping, it’s probably room service. Gonna tell them to come back later.” He said before leaving a small peck on Louis’ lips.

He quickly put some loose pants as he admired the view in front of him. Louis looked completely ravished, Harry’s marks all over his body, small and soft between his sheets. He needed to get rid of whoever was at his door so he could go back to bed with his boy, quickly.

To Harry’s surprise, the person who was knocking wasn’t part of the hotel staff, but Anton. Harry’s stomach dropped. He was so busy playing boyfriends with Louis he forgot to talk with him about Jeff’s plan. A plan he wasn’t going to be part of anymore, no matter how much Jeff thought it was a great idea. Harry knew Louis pretty well and knew that if he had any possibility of being with Louis in any form, he would never accept him fake dating anyone as a public stunt, that plan could end them and Harry couldn’t let that happen.

Anton’s gaze was focused on Harry’s chest, he didn’t have to look down to imagine what he was seeing. Louis. 

“Is everything okay, Ant?” 

Anton snapped from his daze. “Oh yeah, yes,” He shook his head. “Umm… I is just— I wanted to ask if you were free today, so we could see the castles before we wrap up.” A faint blush covered his cheeks.

Before Harry could let him down gently he felt warm arms wrap around his torso.

“Hey Anton, still filming?” Louis said as he laid his head on Harry’s shoulders. He was almost sure Louis was on his tiptoes and for some reason Harry’s heart melted at that.

“It’s Sunday, we don’t have calls on sundays.” Anton voice was blank and a bit snappy. “Sorry, I thought you were alone.” He said, looking at Harry.

Harry felt Louis’ arms tense around him, he put his hand on top of Louis’ and squeezed hard in hopes he felt at least a bit reassured.

“No, I’m with Louis.” Harry smiled as he nudged Louis’ temple with his chin. He still needed to talk with Anton, make some things clear.

“Yeah, umm, well, I’ll leave you to well-- I’ll see you later, okay?” He said starting to leave.

“Sure, sure.” Harry nodded not trying to extend Anton’s visit.

“Bye, Anton.” Louis’ voice was muffled against Harry’s shoulder. 

Anton kept walking away without looking back or reply.

The first thing Harry noticed when he turned to Louis after he closed the door was that he was wearing one of his clean shirts, the second thing was how fucking good he smelled. Harry cleaned him thoroughly last night but he still could smell the faint smuky reminder of what happened the night before. He smirked at Louis, “Thought you were sleepy, baby.”

His lips began to press tiny little kisses all over Louis’ face before he let out a small whine and kissed Harry like he owned him, nibbling his bottom lip. Harry carried him easily to the bed.

“Please, let me suck you.”

Harry swallowed hard. “Shit, baby, don’t say shit like that out of nowhere.” He grunts, trying to control his heart and dick.

“Why? I did say ‘please’.” Louis blinked innocently as he crawled between Harry’s legs.

“You did say please.” Harry confirmed as he rubbed his thumb gently across Louis’ bottom lip. “Such a sweet boy, _my_ sweet boy.” Louis’ eyes fluttered and his mouth opened to lick his thumb. “Go on then.” He said pulling his cock out with no finesse, Louis immediately mouthed the base . “Suck it, honey.” 

Louis pressed a light kiss to the head before starting to give it open mouthed kisses. Harry shudders as Louis tongue flicks against the back of his balls. He could already feel Louis’ grinding against the bed as he started to suck at him slowly. Wide mouth and glazy eyes at full display of Harry.

He spread his legs further and let the feeling of Louis’ mouth around him possess him. Cock throbbing every time Louis’ chin touched his balls. 

“Gonna fuck your face, sweetheart. Gonna fuck it good and hard, are you ready?” Louis nods frantically and squeezed Harry’s leg with trembling hands. 

Putting his hand on Louis’ head, he began to push him down slowly, making him take him entirely, Louis let out a deep throaty moan that Harry felt in his cock. He fucks Louis’ mouth slow and deep, head spinning with want as he feels his throat opening up for him, warm, hot and ready. Louis’ arched his back and Harry’s body fills with the needs to eat him out. He _needs_ to.

Harry let Louis’ head go, instantly regretting it when he heard Louis’ whine.

“I need you to turn around baby.” Louis frowned mouth still full on Harry’s dick. “Gonna eat you out.”

Louis’ eyes went incredibly big, but Harry didn’t have to tell him twice before he was laying on his tummy, perfect ass pointing toward him. Harry’s mouth watered at the view and quickly put himself to work, tongue sliding over Louis’ tailbone until he reached his goal. 

What started as gentle circles turned into hungry, almost desperate licks. Harry licked him, tongue rolling and flattening out to lap at him before going through it all over again, until saliva was dripping down his balls. He felt Louis begin to loosen, spreading his cheeks wide, wide, wide letting Harry in as deep as he pleased. Tongue going in and out of Louis as his hole clenched and unclenched around him, making the most amazing sounds above him.

God, Harry was so hard.

Louis pushed his ass against Harry’s face, small needy thrusts that made Harry fight the urge to just climb and fuck him raw.

“Please, want to come, please.” Louis slurred. 

“God, you’re so cute when you’re desperate.” Harry grunt before biting Louis’ cheek. 

“Please.”

“How wet are you, baby?” He said as he rested his forehead against his back, erection grinding against Louis’ spit-slick crack. 

Louis let out a shaky breath pushing his ass back against Harry’s cock. “Very.”

“Let’s see.” Harry whispered into Louis’ jaw, touching the tip of his in fact very wet erection. He wraps his hand around it and Louis’ body shakes. “We ran out of condoms so I can’t properly fuck you,” Louis made a noise that sounds like a sob and Harry’s heart aches a bit because of it. “I know, honey, but we’re going to do the next best thing.” He said, grabbing the forgotten lube in the nightstand and smearing a good amount of it inside Louis’ asscheeks. “Close them, baby.”

Harry placed a hand on Louis’ hip and with the other he took his cock and slid it between the crack of Louis’ perfect ass. 

It felt all kinds of perfect and when Louis clenched around him experimentally Harry couldn’t help but hiss a “ _Jesus fuck_.” 

Louis sucked in a breath, and turned his face at Harry. “I can see you.” he said with a small voice, intense gaze directed at Harry’s head peeking out near the small of his back.

“Of course you can.” Harry said before rolling his hips. “Can you feel me, sweetheart?

Louis clenched his ass tightly again as a response and Harry began to rut between them, cock slipping through the slick and wrinkly crease. Teeth scraping against the curve of Louis’ throat. He let out a strangled sound that Harry rewards with slicked hands rubbing his needy cock.

“You’re so sweet and wet, so good, my honey, Mine. _So mine_.” Harry didn’t know anymore what he was saying but it didn’t matter much, because Louis was as gone as him. 

The wet sound of his hand wanking Louis battled with the sound of his balls slapping the back of Louis’ thighs but everything came into a halt when Louis loudly cried out. 

“ _Fuck yes, I’m yours_.” 

And just like that, Harry was coating Louis’ back with long ribbons of spunk, ears ringing as he came. Louis’ body trembled with pleasure as Harry kept jerking him and pressing damp, open mouthed kisses along his neck until he came with the sweetest mewl. 

_Fuck, Harry was so in love._

\--

Sticky still, Harry held Louis tightly for god knows how long. Hand caressing his back slowly. He was in heaven.

“Hey, umm… are you mad at me?” Louis breaks their silence with small voice as he buried his face into Harry’s chest.

Harry frowns and looks down at Louis. “Why would I be mad at you?” He asked, confused.

“Well… because I interrupted your conversation this morning.”

Harry brings him closer and kisses his head, just cause he can. “The only thing I was mad about is that I had to interrupt my morning cuddling session with you.”

Louis eyes shined so bright, Harry was almost blinded by it. “So you were having a cuddling session with me while I was sleeping?” He wiggled his brows. “Kinky.”

“God, honey, you have this way of making everything sound so gloriously dirty.” Harry groaned.

Louis giggled and wrinkled his nose. “Why do you call me honey and sweetheart so much lately?”

Harry kissed his nose. “Because you’re so sweet and sticky. Look.” He swiped a finger between Louis’ cum-wet ass. Louis gasped and buried his face in the crook of his neck. “You’re the sweetest person I know.” He whispered against Louis hair. “You’re a sweetheart, my honey.”

Louis’ eyes were now focused on Harry, searching for something and Harry was praying he found it in his own eyes. 

_‘Please, see me. Choose me, Choose us’_

The spell was broken when Harry’s phone crashed against the wooden floor. Harry picked him up to find 12 missed calls and 30 messages from Jeff and two from Anton. He opened the last one.

\-----------------------------------

_I’m so sorry, I told my manager_

_about you maybe wanting out_

_and she told your manager we_

_weren’t stunting anymore and_

_I think he isn't very happy. I’m_

_really, really sorry :C:C_

\------------------------------------

_‘Well, fuck…’_

“What’s going on?” Louis asked with a concerned tone.

Without replying he scrolled through Jeff’s messages, a string of curses and threats regarding his career. Harry’s blood ran a bit cold, not because of the threats, but for the things he remarked about his relationship with Louis. Things Harry didn’t want to face, at least not with Louis’ taste still on his tongue. 

Was he making a mistake? Harry for a split of a moment doubted about everything, but one thing he had clear. He needed to set things straight with Anton as soon as possible, stunt aside, he still was Harry’s friend and he had blown him off, not even thinking about how he must have felt. He probably even put him in trouble with his own manager.

“Harry?” Louis squeezed his leg and Harry closed his eyes. 

How easy would be to just escape again of all his responsibilities buried inside Louis, laying next to him. God, Harry wanted that so badly. But right now he didn’t deserve that. 

“I need to make a call.” Harry said still not looking at Louis, well knowing his resolve would crumble as soon he looked at him. He needed to fix all the messes he created.

“O-okay but, are you alright?” Louis sounded small and concerned and Harry felt like crying. 

“Yeah, yes. I just _really_ need to make this call.”

“Alright.” Louis whispered, hand still placed on Harry’s leg.

He searched for Anton’s number and quickly called him. He replied at the second ring. 

“Harry, I’m for real so sorry. I didn’t think he was going to get so mad.” Anton voice sounded almost frantic.

“Ant, Anton, darling. Calm down, it’s okay, I shouldn’t-- It’s on me, yeah? “It’s all my fault, I am the one who is sorry about all of this.” 

“I shouldn’t have told her anything, but her intentions weren’t bad Harry. We thought it was for the best before he sent the papers, we didn’t sign anything, we really thought it was going to be easy.”

“Don’t worry about him, don’t think about him. We’re going to be good, please don’t be sad because of him, it’s really not worth it.”

“He told her you were going to do whatever he wanted or else you could search another manager. I know he’s a close friend, the last thing I wanted was to ruin your relationship with him.”

Harry sighed. “It took me a lot of time to realize there wasn’t a relationship between us since years ago.” It felt odd to finally say it out loud but as soon the truth was out, he felt a weight lift from his shoulders. Jeff wasn’t his friend, he hardly was a good manager.

“I’m so sorry to hear that.”

“Eh, it’s okay,” Harry shrugged forgetting Anton couldn’t actually see him. “I have people with me that I madly adore and that support me, I’ll be fine.” Harry tried to reach the hand on his leg to find there was no hand anymore. There was no Louis. “Hey can we finish this later? I need to check something.”

“Of course, of course we can meet later today or tomorrow.”

“Sure, I’ll let you know.” Harry said quickly already getting up.

His hands were slightly trembling before knocking on the bathroom door. 

_‘Please be there. Please be there. Please be there.’_

“Louis? Are you there?” Harry knocked twice before opening the door slowly. “Sweetheart?”

Nothing… Louis was gone and every single thing Jeff said about them came crashing down.

_‘What if he overheard what Anton was saying and suddenly felt that being with him and all his package was too much? What if he didn’t want to be with a soon to be very unemployed mediocre actor?’_

Harry couldn’t even blame him if he was being honest. His life was probably about to get a lot more complicated. 

He felt his phone ring, already knowing who it was, he picked the phone anyways.

“If you want to destroy your insignificant career for a dick, be my guest. But you’re not doing it in my watch.”

Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “It’s okay, you don’t have to watch. I’m firing you right now.”

\--

Harry was a bit ashamed to admit he tried to reach Louis almost all afternoon, but he just wanted to know what happened. If Louis got tired of him or didn’t want to deal with Harry’s problems, he at least deserved to know.

But while he gathered his courage to confront Louis he met with Anton at the Ice Cream Shop they all went to a few months back.

“So you fired him?” Anton asked surprised.

“Yeah, there was no point in keeping him around. He didn’t believe in me and was trying to control my personal relationships.”

“Fuck, that’s fucked up.”

Harry snorted. “You’re telling me.” Anton smiled easily at him and a wave of guilt washed his body again. “Listen, I wanted to say that I’m really sorry for involving you in all this mess. You were nothing but lovely with me and I’m just… well a mess.”

Anton grabbed his hand as he shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize, like you said, we’re going to be fine.”

“I know it might seem like I wanted to use you but—”

Anton laughed. “Harry, babe. I was fully aware of what was going on between you and Tomlinson. I shot my shot anyway and failed. That’s on me, not you. You never lied or deceived me. Hell, you never even gave me the opportunity to believe I got the slightest of chances.”

Harry was at a loss for words. “I...I’m still very sorry.”

“Tell you what. Give me a big hug and we are even.” Anton smiled bright and easy.

Harry quickly got up and went to give Anton the tightest of hugs. He was about to break it when he saw Louis, Zayn and Niall get in the shop. 

Louis eyes flickered with something Harry couldn't describe, but that unsettled him deeply before turning cold and void of emotions. Zayn for his part openly sneered at him.They turned and went to the counter.

Harry was so fucking confused.

Anton must have felt he tensed because he was breaking the hug and asking what was going on.

“Louis is here, but it seems he got tired of me and now is ignoring me.”

“What the fuck?” Anton almost hissed. “Weren’t you two doing the rabbit dance just this morning?”

“Who the fuck says rabbit dance?”

“You’re avoiding my question.” Anton rolled his eyes. “What happened?”

“I don’t really know,” Harry rubbed his eyes with his hand. “but I suspect he overheard my conversation with you and he decided he doesn't want to be associated with me anymore.”

“But why? That doesn’t make any sense.”

“If I knew why I’d tell you. Maybe I was just a shag for him, a human dildo like they call it.” Harry chuckled as he tried really hard to avoid thinking in the lump in his throat. 

It hurt more than the first time he met him again a few months ago. It hurt cause Anton was right, it didn’t make sense, not after the night they had, not after the morning, not after all those months. It felt real, it felt sincere. But yet again, back then it also felt all kinds of real and Louis also fucked him over. So who knows…

Louis briskly walked past him licking again a purple and black ice cream without even looking at Harry’s direction. As if he didn’t exist.

Harry felt his heart break a bit, but his mind was fuming. How fucking dare he to play with Harry’s feelings like that? Without saying anything to Anton he quickly got up and marched to where Louis left. 

He was about to reach him when someone harshly pulled him back. 

Harry expected Zayn, but his mouth dropped when he realized who was the one pulling him aside.

“Don’t you dare get near him again because he might be a professional, but I have nothing to lose. And even if I had,” Niall said getting closer to Harry with hard cold gaze. “I don’t give a single fuck. If you try to reach him, I’m going to end not only your career, but descendancy.” Harry’s eyes widened. “Gonna rip your balls and feed them to your little boyfriend over there, understood? Great, have an excellent night, mate!” He slapped his shoulder hard and turned around, leaving Harry even more confused than he was

Walking again to the table he saw Anton holding two cones of ice cream.

“I really don’t want to eat right now.” Harry plopped in his chair, trying to shake the weird feeling of how strange Niall looked when he wasn’t smiling or eating. 

“Oh no no, I didn’t get these, someone give them as a gift. And even if you wanted to eat them, I doubt you’d like them, they taste sour and bitter, not the best combination.” Anton scrunched his nose. “I’m pretty sure Louis sent them.”

Harry then remembered those weren’t common ice creams but were based on feelings. He grabbed the first waiter he saw. “Excuse me, can you tell me which flavor is this ice cream?”

The waiter smiled. “Do you mean feeling, sir? Because our ice creams are—”

“Yes yes, based on feelings.” Harry interrupted exasperated. “Which feeling is it?”

“Well… Betrayal.”

Harry’s eye twitched. “And the purple and black? Can you tell me which feeling it is?”

“Oh… that’s a very good one. It’s jealousy.”

Harry’s heart flutters. Harry’s heart shutters. He needed to talk with Louis no matter if his balls ended up as part of a full course meal.

\--

By the time he got back to his room, Harry had an entire plan laid out for how he would make Louis explain what happened between them.

“Yeah, I don’t think you’re thinking this one through, mate.” Mitch said on the other side of the line.

“It’s a full proof plan.” Harry objected.

“Don’t think any plan involved goats is full proof plan, H.”

Harry frowned. “You don’t understand, Louis loves goats, he says—”

“They’re the closest thing we have to unicorns,” Mitch interrupted him. “He called them undeveloped unicorns. Which is extremely inaccurate, cause horses are literally unicorns without horns, how the fuck did he come up with that? Goats aren’t even similar to unicorns.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “That’s why he says they're the undeveloped version.”

“That’s not even what undeveloped means!” 

“Are you completely sure about that?”

“Well… I—Look, I’m not a mathematician, I don’t know about geography, alright? But goats aren’t the closest thing we have to unicorns and he needs to know that, Harry. He needs to.”

“Well, with more reason, I have to get that goat by tomorrow afternoon.”

“What you need to do right now is fucking go to sleep while I search for your new agent slash manager.”

Harry grimaced with the reminder but thanked his best friend for helping anyways. “I don’t know what I would be doing without you.”

Mitch snorted. “Looking for a fucking Irish goat or some dumb shit like that.”

“No, seriously, thanks for listening to me rant. I know you also don’t like Louis a lot and this might look a bit autodestructive, but… there’s something I’m missing and I’m not understanding.”

“Don’t sweat it. Sure, he’s not my favorite person after what he did back then and now, but you’re a smart man and I want to believe you know what you’re doing.”

Harry’s smile broadens, the first sincere one since before Louis left him that morning. “I’m really lucky to have you.”

“You really are.” Mitch laughed. “Now go fucking sleep, the last thing you need right now is them firing you because you messed up your scenes”

“I take everything back, you fucking suck.”

Mitch snorted. “Whatever man, you know I’m right and will thank me tomorrow.”

“Doubt it, but I’m leaving. Night, mate.”

“Night, H.”

Harry ended the call and tried to sleep with no success. Mind running in circles about everything that happened in just one single day.

A fucking Sunday. 

He had a slight suspicion of what might’ve happened, but all of his theories were solely based in fucking ice creams so he couldn't take it too seriously. 

Either way, the gut feeling was there and if Louis left because he thought Harry was seeing Anton, they might still have some hope. Harry just needed to clarify what happened before his friends came to tackle him down. He just needed to find out how.

At the end of the day, it didn’t matter if Louis’ friends ran him over with a truck, he just needed to make things clear and he will do anything to do so.

\--

If Harry was being honest, he pictured his first encounter with Louis after the night prior going very different. 

They were busy all day filming different scenes, all heavy and stressful ones. But there was one in particular that made Harry’s heart shatter.

_“See that?” Yorgos said to anyone and everyone who wanted to listen. The scene was one of the biggest ones in the movie. Louis’ character had to accept he now was blind, that someone he trusted took something as big as his vision and as important as the opportunity to have a soulmate. “He has to pretend that everything is okay but the world is ending inside of him. it’s magic, that look” he said pointing his finger at the screen. “it’s magical.”_

_There was a small twitch on his eyebrow, almost imperceptible. The same type of twitch Harry saw him do as he hugged Anton._

_“Did you catch that?” Yorgos whispered into his mic. All the cameramen working gave a thumbs up. “We just caught a heart breaking on camera. Isn’t that beautiful?”_

_Harry felt like screaming._

At that point of the day, Harry just wanted to talk with Louis and cuddle with him after. Tell him about Jeff and how shitty everything was. But even after all his effort he couldn’t find a single moment Louis wasn’t flanked by Niall and Zayn. 

So when he found Louis relaxed besides Anton from all the people outside his camper, he saw an opportunity that just couldn’t let pass. 

Harry heard Anton snort. “Okay but this comes from a person who drinks cheap wine with ice.”

“I always mix it with sparkling water and splenda.” Louis shrugged. “Isn’t that how all La Croixé taste anyways?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s very incorrect but– Harry! Hey, mate, come sit with us, we’re eating Louis’ nasty mix of chips and ranch, it’s disgustingly good.”

This was Harry’s opportunity to make things right, to talk with Louis. He just needed to say the right thing.

“How can you eat that shit?” Harry asked because self-sabotage was a thing and Harry’s biggest enemy was himself.

“How can you eat with that face?” Louis arched a brow but a hint of a smile was blooming in his face. 

Banter, Harry was good at banter. He could totally do banter. 

“It’s a pretty basic stuff, I open my mouth, then I put food inside of it. Pretty easy.”

Louis scoffed and eyed his face. “My god, you look terrible.” He said, probably noticing that despite the make up, he still looked tired and worn out. 

“Are you calling me ugly?”

“You’re calling yourself ugly.” Louis sniffed. “I’m just feeling pity by the fact.” He lifted his cup and took a sip from it.

_‘Fuck it.’_

Harry walked close to Louis until his feet were touching Louis’. “You weren’t calling me ugly yesterday morning when you were kissing me all over and deep throating my c—.”

Louis made a strangled noise before recovering as Anton said, “Okay, I think that’s my cue to leave. Have fun doing… whatever you’re doing right now. Jesus christ you’re so weird.”

Without missing another bit, Louis smirked devilishly at Harry. “Now that you’re bringing it, well it’s a pretty basic stuff, you know? I just have to… open my mouth then I put food inside of it. Pretty easy.” He echoes Harry’s words. “Besides, your cock is flawless, don’t ever dare to talk badly about it.”

“I didn’t—“

“Ever.”

After that, they both paused for a moment, letting their eyes speak for them. Harry could see everything in Louis’ eyes, the hunger, the fire, he also could see the hurt and anger, but this time wasn’t directed at Harry, no, it was _for_ Harry. 

“You know…”

Louis cast his eyes down. “Anton told me, don’t be mad at him, he just wanted to clear the air between us.” He looked at Harry. “I’m really sorry.”

Harry sat beside him. “Why are you apologizing? You haven’t done anything, but make me happy these past months.”

“Yeah?” Louis looked so vulnerable, Harry just wanted to wrap him in a tight hug. 

And just because he could, he did exactly that. In a matter of seconds he had his lap full of Louis. 

“Yes, baby.” Harry kisses Louis’ collarbone. “No one has helped or hyped me as much as you do.”

“I’m sure your mom does it to.”

Harry let out a mortified laugh. “Sweetheart, please let’s not mention my mom when I’m thinking of all the ways you make me happy.”

Louis gasped as his face flushed. “You’re so dumb.”

“You make me a bit dumb.” Harry rubbed Louis’ nose with his.

“I’m also very dumb.” Louis whispered with his eyes closed.

Harry hummed. “You’re not dumb, I was thinking and my conversation with Anton should’ve sounded really bad on your end.”

Louis gulped. “I—I thought you were talking about me with him. It felt wrong and part of me knew it didn’t make a lot of sense but… I just didn’t want to get hurt.”

“Oh honey, no, no. I’d never do that to you. I—Jeff, he… I kinda fucked Anton over because of him.”

“Yeah, he told me.” Louis closed his eyes for a few seconds and when he opened them again he had this fierce look in them. “God, your manager is a fucking useless twat. He only sees you as a pretty face who’s opportunities will fade away when your youth does. He doesn’t believe in you, but I’ve seen you act, Harry. You’re so fucking good and you need to be aware of it. Of how good you are and how much you’re worth. Your talent will never fade away, your talent is yours and you need to defend it. You don’t need public relationships to stand out, you only need—” 

Harry was kissing him before he could finish, savoring every nibble and lick Louis gave him. He aimed for a brief kiss, but having a soft and pliant Louis on top of him made him change his mind pretty quickly. He grabbed Louis’ face with both hands, keeping him close as he kissed him back. Tender kisses for a tender mouth, with nothing but adoration behind every flick of their tongues. 

Harry briefly broke the kiss. “I fired him last night.”

Louis smiled, a big beautiful grin that spread from one cheek to another, making his eyes crinkle. “You did? That’s so wonderful, love. I’m so proud of you!” Harry wanted to trace his smile, to dip the tip of his tongue in his small dimple. “I’m going to ask Liam if he can take you or if he knows someone who can.”

Harry wanted to hold him forever. “Have I told you how sweet you’re today? 

Louis giggles and nuzzled his nose against Harry’s neck. “No, you were too busy sulking over me, silly.” 

“But look how far my sulking got me.”

Louis snorted. “Pretty sure the one doing all the work was Anton, you just criticized the things I eat.” 

“We both know I didn’t criticize _all_ the things you eat, just those weird chips that u were eating as an excuse to drink ranch.”

Harry felt Louis’ smile against his skin. “Hey, umm… so we only have around one week filming.” Harry’s heart started racing. “And well, I don’t know if you have something scheduled after this...” Louis looked enraptured by one of Harry’s shirt buttons. “But if you’re free and umm I don’t know want to spend some days with me… my apartment is really nice.”

Harry grinned and squeezed Louis’ waist. “Honey, there’s nothing I want—” Something inside Harry twisted painfully.

“What’s wrong? You don’t want it? Because that’s totally fine, it was just a suggestion, we still can find time to see each other from time to time.” Louis said hurriedly.

“God, no, baby. I’d love to be with you for a bit more, but after this I’m basically unemployed and I need to search for new roles or else all the money I earned here will go to pay my bills and nothing else.”

Louis seemed like he was battling with himself to not say something before settling for a faint, “No, yeah, I understand.” 

“Look at me, sweetheart.” Harry whispered as he grabbed Louis’ chin. “We will see each other. I promise, you will get tired of me of how much we will see each other. I just need to settle and find my ground. I want you to be proud of me.” Louis opened his mouth to say something but Harry continued before he could say anything. “I want to be proud of myself.” 

Louis’ gaze turned soft before leaving soft pecks on Harry’s eyelids. “I can’t wait for that.” 

**EPILOGUE**

The first month after they finished the movie, was one of the craziest months of Harry’s entire life. As soon as he landed in New York, both Mitch and Liam had people who wanted to represent Harry, one of them being Liam himself, with two possible films that fitted Harry like a glove. It took Harry less than a day to decide that Liam was the right one and it took them less than two weeks to find Harry the next perfect role.

Things with Louis were more than great, if you ignore the fact that none of his friends wanted to actively talk with Harry and they just upgraded their relationship to enemies with benefits to friends with the exact same benefits.

They still didn’t talk about the past, it was like an unspoken rule. They could talk about everything and everyone but their past. Harry was okay with all of it, he could settle with anything Louis would want to give him. He was just really grateful to have him in his life again.

A year had passed by and it was time to start promoting their movie. The press tour began in February and ended mid-April and during those months Louis snuck in that his celebrity crush was Harry about six times and Harry hinted that Louis was his dream husband at least twice. The press were eating them up and suddenly, they were the bromance of the moment. A primal part of Harry was elated by the fact they knew how much they meant for each other, that wherever Louis went, it was almost sure Harry was going to. 

The movie was a success, everyone fascinated and puzzled by the merge of romantic drama with the distinctive and sombre touch of Yorgos’ hand. 

Film critics called Louis and Harry’s chemistry in the movie unstoppable, their love unavoidable and brutally in your face –Yorgos teared up with that one–. They called the movie a hilarious anti-humor masterpiece, an Academy Award front-runner. 

Harry still couldn’t believe his luck. 

After the movie buzz died, movie directors actually called Liam to see if Harry was free to send them videos reading dialogues from his movies. Louis for his part was static, booked and busy, but always had time for Harry, no matter the day or the hour.

There were some sleepless nights during that year where Harry laid down thinking about the very real possibility of Louis finding someone new. He was aware they weren’t actually exclusive, because neither of them brought up the topic and Harry just didn’t want to disturb what they had. 

One of their worst rows was when Louis got papped besides Tristan looking domestic as hell buying a fucking christmas tree while Harry was filming in Canada. _Fucking Canada._

Harry was snappish through all their FaceTime call that night and Louis ignored it all like a champ until he couldn’t more, rolled his eyes and ended the call. They didn’t talk for a day and a half. 

Yes, that was their worst row. 

Mitch suggested Harry to put in practice the open part of their open relationship. Harry explained to him that it was more of a friends with benefits arrangement and Mitch told him he was a whipped moron. Either way Harry didn’t need or want to sleep with anyone besides Louis.

They moved in together three months after that, and Harry printed the “ _Oscar Winner Louis Tomlinson and best pal Harry Styles moves in together in their NYC luxury bachelor pad.”_ headline and hung it on the fridge, right besides their grocery list in their extremely cozy so not bachelory at all loft. 

To the media, they were friendship goals and continued to be just that until a very hasty night where both of them drank a bit too many drinks and got papped snogging like a pair of teenagers outside the club. 

Liam refereed to that incident as The Dark Night and his worst PR nightmare. He still laughed through it all and laughed even more as soon people put two and two together, realizing they had the same manager and assumed it was all a publicity stunt.

They didn’t care, they got papped eating ice cream and holding hands. They got papped carrying grocery bags and a sex swing. The paps weren’t aware of this, but they had a media database of how Harry was falling in love with Louis over and over again. Harry was grateful of that. 

Niall shows up to Louis’ birthday and Louis showed him very proudly every single magnet Harry had brought him from every movie location he has been. He doesn’t brag about the other multiple gifts that Harry now can afford to buy for him –together they found out how much Louis loves to be spoiled and how much Harry loves to spoil Louis. Zayn doesn’t show up and Louis’ eyes dim a bit. 

“Don’t kick yourself, mate.” Niall said reassuringly as they watch Louis chat with his mom. “He’ll come around, he has to. It’s been what? Three years? If you wanted to hurt Louis, you’d have done it already. You’re good.” 

“I just wanted to give him a good party with all the people he loves.” 

“And you gave him that. Zayn might not be here in presence, but he is probably nagging Louis through texts. He has Zayn and he has all of us. Also they’re going to some bougie spa in two days and you’re paying for both of their sessions.”

Harry snorted, a bit more relieved. “Am I?”

“Mhm, sure you are. Zayn told me he has planned to convince Louis to max your credit card. He’s very excited about it.”

Harry laughed. “I don’t think he understands how already paid sessions works.”

“Please let him continue blissfully unaware.” 

—

Harry sees Zayn for the first time in almost half a year in Liam’s office a few weeks after Louis’ birthday. 

He played with the possibility of just ignoring him and waiting for Liam, but he wanted Louis to have the option of inviting his best friend to his own house even when Harry was around. He wanted Louis to have everything he wanted and the only way Harry could give him that was if he talked with Zayn. 

“Can I sit here?” Harry asked cautiously.

“It’s a free country.” Zayn replied, eyes still focused on his phone.

“I know you don’t like me but—”

Zayn put his phone down and cut Harry off. “It’s not only that I don’t like you –I don’t like cucumbers, but I eat them anyway because they’re healthy, I don’t like the color yellow, but it looks amazing in me. I don’t like the beach, but I tan the best there.– I don’t trust you and I don’t trust you around Louis. But he does and for some extremely wicked reason I trust Louis with my entire life.” 

Harry pressed his lips in a tight line. “You think I’m going to hurt him.” It wasn’t a question but a statement. 

“I _know_ you’re going to hurt him, sooner or later.” Zayn sneered.

“Zayn, it’s been years since we started whatever we have.” Harry watches how Zayn’s eyes turn stony at his words. “I’m gonna stay by his side as long as he’ll let me.”

Zayn let out a scornful laugh. “Just like you did when he was nineteen and vulnerable?” 

“What the hell are you talking about?” Harry’s anger ran through his body. Nobody could talk about their past, it was their rules.

“He was in love with your sorry ass and you fucking left him. He might have forgotten but people like you—” Zayn took a deep breath. “people like you never change.” 

“You think I just simply left?” Harry exclaimed confused. “He sabotaged my first –and back then– only chance I had to work in a serious movie, to give it to you! And even after that I tried to reach him like a moron, but by the time I did that he already had me blocked everywhere!” Harry snapped.

“Don’t play the victim here, I was there, I saw everything. You might deceive other people but I saw what went down and Louis called you non-stop for weeks and you ignored him.” 

“I never– I didn’t–”

“Spare your babbling for someone who believes it. And what the fuck are you even talking about? Nobody has given me _anything_ , I've worked my ass off to have a place here, a respectable one. Because for the majority of the people in this shitty industry, I was just a financial risk, even for Liam.” Zayn laughs a bit hysterically pointing at Liam’s door. “I know he believes in me _now,_ but back then… I was just damaged goods. I was a stereotype. But Louis saw me for what I actually am, a goddamn _good_ actor. The only thing close to interfering with my career he did was giving my audition tape to _Liam_ so he could pass it to a director. Louis back then had as much influence as you and me.”

Harry’s entire world shattered. “But Jeff said…”

“Jeff as in your ex manager?” Zayn snorted. “I don’t know what to tell you, man, we all auditioned for the same role, you, Louis, and I. Following your logic he fucked himself over, too.” 

“Wait, but he got a role in that movie too, it was actually thanks to it that you two started to get more serious roles.”

“Because he’s a good actor, you idiot! He had the range even back then to interpret and cast for several roles. I don’t know what the fuck your ex manager told you, but you never stood a chance.”

Harry felt like he couldn’t breathe, not only because he was just finding out Jeff lied and manipulated him into believing Louis betrayed and left him, but because how much Harry hurt Louis in the process. No wonder why Louis doesn’t want to have anything serious with Harry now.

“And now that we’re finally saying what we had to say since years ago, how the fuck do you want me to trust you to take care of my friend if you don’t even want to call him your boyfriend when he can’t fucking stop talking about how incredible you are and how in love he is with you?” 

“In love…” Harry echoed with a faint whisper.

“I told you, you don’t have to play dumb with me, you know—“ 

“Shut up.” Harry hissed cutting Zayn off. “Shut up before you say something more. Louis still hasn’t told me he loves me yet and you fucking… babbled it as if it was your right. I love him too, more than anyone and anything, and right now I can’t fucking stand you, but as much as I love Louis, he loves you and it break his heart every time you don’t go to our home just because you don’t want to see me. Those days are done, I’m a moron, you are also a moron and now we’re going to fucking have to deal with it cause of our boy. So this is how things are going to go, you’re going to show up to our New Year’s Eve party because Louis is putting all his love and effort into planning it and you’re going to keep coming back because it’s what Louis wants. Are we clear?” Zayn just nodded. “Perfect, see you in a few days.”

—

Harry’s felt his heart beating wild and fast against his throat from the moment he left Liam’s office to the moment he entered his home. 

“You’re back! Did you bring Pretzels? Oh, you didn’t.” Louis pouted. 

“I—Sorry, I forgot.” Harry replied dumbly as he watched the love of his life sprawled on _their_ couch, wearing Harry’s clothes. 

“It’s okay. But you do remember Niall is coming tonight to play Uno and Monopoly, right?” Harry nodded not moving an inch from the place where he was standing. “Do you also remember that he cheats in both?” 

“You also cheat in both.” Harry said calmly as if his world wasn’t about to change forever after their conversation.

Louis hummed playing with Christine’s –their dog. My god they had a dog.– fur. “Sure, but you _love_ the different ways I distract you every time I do it.”

“I love you.” Harry blurted out of nowhere. Louis smiled at him. “I’m in love with you, very deeply in love.” Louis smile broadened. “And we’re in a relationship, a very serious, committed one. We are boyfriends, a couple.” 

“I sure hope so, because you’ve been dragging me to some really awful dates for the past three years. And there’s this thing where we live together and stuff.” 

“We do live together.” Harry said getting close to Louis. 

“And don’t forget the awful dates.”

“We do go out on a lot of dates.” He sat besides boyfriend.

Holy shit, Harry had a boyfriend for the past three years. 

“Some very terrible ones. Do you remember the time you took me to the dog park for three days straight just so you warmed me up for Christine.”

Harry gasped. “Hey, you love Christine.”

“And who the fuck names their dog Christine?”

“Don’t talk about Christine like that,” Harry said as he covered the dog’s ears. “You will hurt her feelings.” The dog bit his hand and snuggled on top of Louis lap again. “Hey, that’s mean!”

Louis giggled as he laid his head on Harry’s shoulders. “Maybe she gets how terrible of you it was to name her Christine.” 

Harry smiled and kisses the top of his head. 

_‘Focus, Harry, you still need to talk.’_

“We need to talk, baby.” 

Louis head snapped. “About what? What happened?” Louis eyes filled with worry.

“Honey, no, no, everything it’s okay,” Harry said as he shooed Christine of Louis lap and pulled him on top of his. “Wrong use of words, my bad. I’m trying to get better at this, but it’s kinda hard.”

“Then what’s going on?” 

“Remember the first time we broke up?” 

Louis breath hitched. “Yes.”

“Well, it seems there has been a lot of misunderstandings about it.” 

“Harry, it’s okay, we were kids, you made a mistake, you don’t have to apologize for it.”

“This is where you’re wrong, my honey. I do need to apologize, but not about what you think.” 

Louis blinks at Harry. “I think, I’m not really following you, love.” 

“That I’m not gonna apologize for leaving and ignoring you because it never happened.” 

“Okay now you’re not only confusing me, but making me a bit mad.”

“Jeff told me you basically sabotaged my chances to get a role just to give it to Zayn. I never ghosted you, that night I was so crushed I needed time to think and Jeff said it was for the best if he took my phone. I was so crushed, he told me that my career was over, all my and my parents savings, gone. He then provided me all the alcohol I needed for almost three days. I was at my lowest point…”

“And he ‘rescued’ you.” Louis whispered. “That manipulative piece of shit.” 

“Everything was a bit blurry, so when he told me I smashed my phone against the floor when I was sober enough to ask for it, I believed him. Completely forgetting how he never gave it back after the night he took it from me.”

Louis hugged him tightly. “Why are you just telling me all this now?” 

“Because I didn’t know your version of the story. Because we didn’t talk about it. I don’t want that happening ever again, baby. I need you to talk to me about what’s going on inside this head.” Harry kissed Louis’ temple. “No matter how big or small it is. The only way this won’t happen again is if we start to communicate.”

“I can do that.” 

“Yeah?” Harry titled his face, soft smile on his lips.

“Yes.” Louis nodded firmly. “And I also want you to tell me the good, the bad and the ugly, all of it.”

“Well… now that you mention that… there’s something else that’s been bothering me lately.”

“Tell me.”

Harry shuffled to grab something inside his jean’s pocket. “I have this ring,” He said showing Louis a black square box. He gasped and his eyes widened. “And I really don’t know what to do with it. It’s your size and it has something engraved inside that it’s also for you.” 

Louis covered his mouth with both hands, eyes filled with tears. “Harry…” He whispered.

“What do you suggest I should do with it, baby?” Harry smiled at his boy. 

“I…”

“Do you want to try it perhaps and then tell me what you want to do with it?”

Louis let out a choked laugh, happy tears falling down his pretty cheeks. “Please, please.”

Harry opened the box, marveled at how equally marveled Louis was with the ring. It was an infinity engagement ring. It had a beautiful design of an eight shaped pattern filled with diamonds made up with two interlinking bands, emphasizing the center diamond.

“Since I met you,” Louis recited the words engraved inside the ring. “my heart had never felt more red, brave one.” 

“So what do you say, brave one?” Harry's heart felt like it was about to explode from how much love he had for Louis. “Do you want to jump throughout the window with me?”

Louis sobbed a “yes” before kissing all over Harry’s face.

“God, baby,” Harry grunted. “Nobody should look as pretty as you look crying. It could be dangerous.” 

Louis let out a watery laugh. “I only look this pretty while crying when it’s happy tears or when you have your cock deep inside me.” He whispered the last part. 

“The things I’m gonna do to you to see you cry this prettily.” Harry said as he nipped Louis’ jawline, cock already filling up.

“Good thing we have an entire life together to do all of them.”

**Author's Note:**

> Fic based on Prompt 149: Louis and Harry are rivals in the film industry (after working together on set behind the scenes as production interns and being unable to get along because of favoritism over either H or L (author’s call). After becoming wildly successful actors, they aren’t afraid to make mean jabs about each other in interviews, over social media, etc. They have avoided working together again for a couple of years, until they are cast in the same film (rom-com) as each other’s romantic lead. Neither of them are willing to give up their role, so they are forced to spend long hours together, read lines, rehearse, table read, wherein they slowly fall for each other without realizing it.
> 
> The movie Harry and Louis were hired for is The Lobster. Go watch it! 
> 
> Again, thanks for reading!


End file.
